Page 61 of An Icy Christmas Engagement
Cedric was about to deny it when he realized with a start that his aunt was right. If he was not worrying about the business, he was daydreaming about Caroline. Especially after last night.
“So?” Grace probed. “Which is it?”
“Both,” Cedric relented at last.
“Interesting. Why don’t you start from the beginning?”
Cedric sighed again. He didn’t know why he came here. He was not the type to talk to others about his feelings. Confronting his emotions and problems himself was the only thing he was usedto. But they were mounting in him and he needed a release. For once, he supposed it wouldn’t hurt if he tried venting.
“I cannot stop thinking about her,” he began at last. “From the moment I wake to the moment I close my eyes at nights, she is the only thing on my mind. Even when I am trying to work, to focus on the matters I am expected to take care of during the day, she plagues my every thought.”
“You do not seem very bothered by that,” Grace pointed out, sounding a little pleased.
“At first I was. I hardly knew her and our interactions have not been anything worthy of note. But she struck a chord in me and after last night…”
“Say no more. You are smitten with her.”
Again he wanted to deny it. But she was right, he realized. Why did it take him so long to come to that simple conclusion?
“It feels different…from before.”
“With Lady Ashworth?”
Cedric winced when Isabella’s face appeared in his mind. “With her I felt as if I had to show her that I was perfect. But with Caroline, I am myself without having to think about it.”
Grace reached for her cup and hid her smile behind it. “Interesting. So why do you sound so glum about it?”
“Ambrose wants me to marry his daughter,” he said at last. “And I am considering it.”
“Why in God’s name would you do that?”
“He has offered to help me save the business. It is crumbling right in front of my eyes and I am afraid I do not have what it takes to bring it back to its former glory. I cannot let everything my father built be destroyed like this. I can’t.”
Grace was silent for a moment, which only increased his trepidation. Grace was the wisest person he knew. If she didn’t know what to say to help him then he was truly at his wit’s end.
“Sometimes duty and desire stand on opposite ends,” she said at last. “And on rare occasions, they are one and the same. In the case that they oppose each other, you can only ask yourself what you are more willing to give up?” He frowned in confusion and she expounded, “You are losing something by choosing theother. Are you willing to lose the love of your life or the legacy of your father? Which is more important to you?”
“That is an unfair question,” Cedric couldn’t help but grumble.
“Life is unfair. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place.”
“I thought you would be able to tell me what I should do.”
“And bear the responsibility if something goes wrong?” Grace huffed a laugh. “I would not be so foolish.”
He knew she was jesting but he did not have the strength to smile.
“Your parents loved you, you know,” she said softly. “They wanted you to be successful. That business was not for your father but to leave a legacy for you. Everything they had ever done was for you. They wanted your future to be a successful and secure one. But above all, Cedric, they wanted you to be happy. So choose happiness.”
Cedric thought of his mother’s warm smile and the memory of his father’s comforting hand on his shoulder. His throat began to burn.
“Thank you,” he managed to push out. “That is of great help.”
“I’m happy to hear it. Will you stay to have a cup of tea?”
“I have no choice in the matter, I’m sure.”
“Smart man.”
