Page 68 of The Voice of Wild Places
Watt hadn’t expected that.“Right …” he trailed off, unsure what to say.Cornelius was especially quiet, and Watt knew the weird air that existed between them since last night was all his fault.He just didn’t know what to say, or how to fix it.
When they got back to their tent, Maggie immediately jumped onto Watt's cot and laid down with a huff.Cornelius went over to his own cot and stared down at it.Watt watched him, and he startled when Cornelius’ head suddenly jerked up.“I’m going to the fire,” he said, and began to storm past Watt.
Watt took a hold of his upper arm.“Can I come with you?”
Cornelius stopped, staring up at Watt in surprise.Lips pressed thin, he searched Watt’s eyes.Watt stared back, hoping Cornelius found what he wanted.He’d give the man anything if it made everything go back to normal between them.
“Of course,” Cornelius whispered, then shrugged Watt off.Watt’s hand fell to his side, and he flexed his fingers.Neither man moved for the flap leading to the outside world.Hesitantly, Cornelius said, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.Yesterday.I—I was just—”
“Doing the exact same thing I had done.There’s nothing to apologize for.In fact, I’m the one that needs to apologize.I was just surprised.I didn’t—” Watt cleared his throat, and when he spoke again it was low and a bit strained.“I didn’t know you trusted me like that.”
Cornelius’ chest rose and fell with great effort.His hand twitched in an aborted movement towards Watt’s face and ended up settling on his shoulder.He whispered, “Me either.”
Watt’s eyes burned.He opened his mouth, but he couldn’t speak.Cornelius’ smile was unsure, and perhaps a little pitying, but it undid Watt all the same.Like a finishing blow, Cornelius stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Watt.
Watt was being hugged.Held.It was as overwhelming as it had been back in that abandoned village, when he'd revealed his greatest secrets.Cornelius had held Watt beneath the moon and stars, comforting him.It thickened the searing emotion building in Watt’s throat, and so he encircled Cornelius in his arms, holding him tight in an effort to make it all go away.For a moment, it worked.There was nothing but them, and everything unspoken between them but palpable all the same.
Until Andrea Carmine lazily called from outside, “Watt, Cornelius!Are you going to join us?”
Both men startled, jumping away from each other like they’d been caught necking.Maggie grumbled at the same time Cornelius ran a hand over his hair and hissed, “That damn man.”
“I can hear you!”Andrea teased from right outside their tent, his voice too close for comfort.“Don’t keep us waiting.”
His footsteps trailed away from their tent, and Watt sighed.“Still want to go?”
Cornelius straightened to his full height and snatched a cigarette from his case.It was bent and badly damaged, but lit up with a fierce and angry glow.“Of course, can’t let him win.”
“Win?”Watt shook his head, fondness driving the movement.“I’m still waiting for you to tell me how to play the game.”
“Trust me, you don’t want to,” Cornelius said, leading the way out of the tent.Maggie followed them out, panting heavily.The area beheld a different quality at night, thick with possibility.Too many possibilities, all watching from the darkness.Waiting to pounce.
Watt kept close to Cornelius, separated only by Maggie trotting between them.As they approached the bonfire and its curious guests, Watt imagined how the three of them looked.Cornelius’ cigarette dangled from his lips, his hands occupied by his cane and a trouser pocket.He had such a confident air about him, it seemed impossible that a man like this could break.
Watt knew how he felt, but he didn’t know if that translated into the way he looked.Tired, sore, nerves flayed open and heart mildly irritated.He pulled his shoulders back and rolled his neck, hoping it would be enough to make him look as at ease as Cornelius did.Maggie, meanwhile, seemed to be pleased and interested in equal measure.Her ears were perked, and her tongue peeked in and out of the side of her mouth.It'd be hard like this to tell she was exhausted as well.
“Ah, there you are!”Anderson called, pushing out of his folding chair.He clapped Cornelius on the shoulder, and offered Watt a big smile.
“I must confess, I nearly went right to sleep.It’s been an adventure,” Cornelius said, laughing quietly.
“We’d love to hear it, if you feel up to it that is,” Rowland said from his seat beside Anderson’s abandoned chair.“I’m not as young as I used to be, but one’s never too old to hear stories beside the fire, and ours have gotten rather stale as of late.”
“I can imagine.You’ve been here for how long, a year?”Cornelius took up one of the empty chairs nearby Anderson and Rowland, and so Watt followed suit.Anderson sat too, reaching down to pet Maggie when she sniffed his leg.Watt didn’t know these fellas well, but he preferred their immediate company to the others.
“Give or take,” Rowland said.He nodded to Andrea and Francesca, who sat across the fire in the same folding chairs as everyone else did.“Although I believe those two, and Thomas here, were the first Americans to have boots on the ground.I didn’t come until a few months later.”
“And if my ears don’t deceive me, you could’ve been here at the beginning too, isn’t that right, Watt?”Andrea asked.
Watt tilted his head, lifting a shoulder.“The timing was off, but I’m glad to be here now.”
“And how long do you two plan on staying?”Francesca asked, her eyes intent on Watt.Terezinna and Nair who sat beside her seemed equally interested in his answer.Nair was observant, tight brown curls hung over big dark eyes that took in everything.
Watt cleared his throat.“About a month, we’re simply passing through.”
“Really?Where else could you go beyond here?”Nair asked, glancing around the fire.“We are it for a while, yes?”
“Say, where is Antônio?”Cornelius asked suddenly, adjusting his glasses as he looked around.
“Oh, he’s with Benedito and Ana,” Terezinna said, smiling a little.“They were discussing the habits of the local jaguars last I heard.”
