“Everything’s fine. You’re right. We should decorate the steps. We should decorate everything. Don’t you think it’s odd though?”
“Decorating the steps? No, it will be lovely.”
“No, I mean, Kelly. She seems very disinterested in the wedding.”
“She’s never been that kind of girl, Miles. You know that.”
“You don’t think it’s our fault, do you?”
“Don’t go there,” he said. “Not everything about our daughter is because of our parenting. In fact, I’d say very little of who Kellyisis because of our parenting. She came with a personality, remember?”
I did remember. She was eighteen months old when she came to us. Even then she was a self-possessed little creature. I used to say, ‘She weighs twenty-two pounds. Twenty of it is personality.’
Andy said, “Neither of us would have joined the Peace Corps, am I correct?”
“Bite your tongue. You know how I am about mosquitos, and mosquitos seem to be a prerequisite in third world countries. But still—"
“Dinner is amazing by the way,” he said, deliberately cutting me off.
“Thank you,” I said, while wondering if he was right. Was itreallynot our fault—
“What are you thinking as far as food?” he asked.
“Oh, well… It will all have to be organic, sustainable and locally sourced.”
“In the middle of L.A.?”
“Youarebehind the times. We’ll get everything through Fairfax Farms. It’s a collective of urban farmers growing everything you can think of on rooftops all over the city.”
“Really?”
“If it’s buffet there won’t be courses. Grass-fed tri-tip, roasted farm fresh vegetables, a lentil walnut loaf for the vegans, cheese tortellini for the plain old vegetarians, salad, perhaps a pot of vichyssoise.” I couldn’t help but moan. “Sit-down is really so much nicer.”
Andy was buttering a rosemary roll and smiling. “We had vichyssoise at both our weddings.”
“I know. We really should work that in. Kelly will appreciate the family tradition.”
“And alcohol?”
“Nothing pretentious. No champagne. Sparkling wine. I’ve been reading about some excellent sparkling wines coming out of Oregon, Long Island, even Michigan.”
“Sounds like something we should do a show—” Andy stopped abruptly. We’d fallen into old patterns. Eating and chatting and casually coming up with ideas for our show. The show we didn’t have anymore. The relationship we didn’t—
“Sorry about that,” he said, keeping his eyes on his plate. “This is delicious.”
“You said that already.”
“I hope you didn’t make dessert. I’m going to need to run off,” he said.
It was all too strange, too much to deal with. I understood. I’d made a raspberry cheesecake, but I said, “No, no dessert.”
And then I promised myself I would not eat the entire thing the moment he walked out the door. The problem is, I’ve never been good at keeping promises to myself.
14
Andrew Lane
Why did I run off?I wondered as I drove home. I was sure Miles was lying when he said he hadn’t made dessert. He made the most amazing things. I could have stayed—well, I started talking about our show. And I knew if I continued talking about the show, eventually we’d be talking about the way the show ended and that would very likely put an end to the truce. And I liked the truce.