Page 34 of The Wager
“Her ladyship likes to have the distinction of rank preserved—”
“We are all beautiful in the eyes of our Lord, Mr. Collins.”
This gentle reprimand came from Mary. It was obvious to Elizabeth, given the disgusted look her next youngest sister sent toward Papa’s cousin, that she still suffered a headache and wished him silent.
“I am certain,” Mamma attempted to smooth over the rough edges of the conversation while still gracing Mary with a sympathetic look. “If Miss de Bourgh is as charming as you declare, she is the belle of every ball she attends.”
“Unfortunately, she is of a sickly constitution, which has prevented her from making a grand entrance into the elevated society her mother enjoys. However, Miss de Bourgh is a perfectly amiable, genteel sort of lady, and often condescends to drive by my humble abode in her little phaeton and ponies.”
“How old is Lady Catherine’s daughter?”
“She reached her majority this past summer.”
“The same age as my dear Jane,” Mamma said with a loving smile. “She reached her majority just before Easter.”
“I had not realized you were so old, Cousin Jane. I am surprised you are still unmarried.”
Six ladies and one gentleman stared at Mr. Collins who, upon realizing the table had gone unnaturally silent, glanced up from cutting his food.
“Do you espouse such nonsense to your patroness when speaking of her yet unmarried daughter?” Papa almost growled out through clenched teeth.
“Of course not! I have more than once observed to Lady Catherine that her charming daughter seemed born to be a duchess. These are the kind of little things which please her ladyship, and it is a sort of attention which I conceive myself peculiarly bound to pay.”
“Let me understand you clearly. Because Lady Catherine is the daughter of an earl, you are bound to pay her daughter mindless compliments, while my daughter, whom you perceive as simply a gentleman’s daughter, you insult with impunity.”
Wide-eyed, Mr. Collins gaped at his elder cousin. Realizing her husband’s temper was flaring into a dangerous zone, Mamma changed the subject.
“Has Miss de Bourgh been presented? I do not remember seeing her name among the ladies at court.”
“Her indifferent state of health unhappily prevents her from being in town. I told Lady Catherine myself the British court has been deprived of its brightest ornament. Had she the strength to attend, I am positive the Queen herself would have kissed her brow and asked her for tea.”
No one dared tell the obsequious little man that both Jane and Elizabeth, in the company of their Aunt Sarah,didhave tea with the Queen. None of them wanted him to fawn over their elevated status. Let him think of them as simply a gentleman’s daughters. Elizabeth decided to pick up the conversation thread and stitch a different picture.
“Have you any hobbies, Mr. Collins?”
She could not have hit upon a better topic and the gentleman launched into a detailed explanation of his aviary, the herb garden he tended to with great care, and how fortunate he was to have a substantial glebe attached to the parsonage. This took the family through to the end of their supper, whereupon they congregated in the family drawingroom.
Mr. Collins offered to read to them from Fordyce’s Sermons, but Papa declined the offer and brought out the backgammon board.
“Our rector, Mr. Abernathy, provides ample care for our family’s spiritual health. While here in Hertfordshire, Mr. Collins, please consider yourself on vacation. Now, let me assess your ability with backgammon.”
Jane, Elizabeth, and Mary all shared a knowing look when their father told his cousin to consider himself on vacation. It was their father’s way of reminding them that Mr. Collins would find no bride beneath the eaves of Longbourn.
Chapter Ten
Thenextfewdaystaught Elizabeth the value of intellectual conversation and good manners, none of which Mr. Collins possessed in great measure. Things came to a head when Mrs. Bennet asked her daughters to show Mr. Collins one of Longbourn’s treasures.
“I think he will be pleased with the hermitage,” Mamma said, knowing Lydia loved nothing more than exploring the quaint little cottage at the back of their property.
“You have a hermitage?” Mr. Collins asked.
“Oh, yes!” Lydia declared. “It has long been abandoned, and I have no idea how anyone could have lived in such a tiny house.”
“Lady Catherine herself has a folly on her grounds,” Mr. Collins said, puffing up his chest. “These great houses always seem to have some magnificent edifice which makes the grounds look so very grand.”
“I am certain our poor hermitage could never compare with Lady Catherine’s folly.” Elizabeth tried to hide her smile. “However, it is all we can manage and it is unique.”
Soon, all had on their appropriate outerwear and gathered near the west door. The two youngest skipped ahead, followed more sedately by Mary. To Elizabeth’s chagrin, Mr. Collins chose to escort her and Jane and made a few awkward attempts to take her sister’s arm. When they reached the portion of the park that ran parallel to the graveled drive, Jane stopped walking and removed his hand from her arm.
