Page 54 of No Way Home
All the hope-filled oxygen in my lungs vanished, and just like that, the question that had haunted me for two years—who was she more upset about losing, me or Griff—was finally answered. Which wasn’t a surprise. After what I’d done on Breaking Curfew, she probably loathed me.
“He’s good.” I cleared my throat. “He loves it out west. Says he was made for the dry air.” I despised it every time he said that. If Mom’s hopes were balloons strung up on a wall, he just kept tossing darts—one “life’s better out west” comment at a time. The more he loved it there, the more air leaked out of her dream of him ever coming home. “They just wrapped up a wildfire they’ve been fighting for two months—” I sucked in a gasp as pain seared across my palm “—in the Sierra Nevadas.”
“I saw him…at Hollister,” she said in a hush. “I didn’t even know he wanted to model.” She patted the cut with the gauze, taking some of the sting out. “I didn’t recognize him at first. Can you believe he buzzed his hair?”
That’s right. Not only was Griffin a daredevil firefighting hotshot now, he was a professional model.
“Doesn’t even look like him,” I said. “Gained forty pounds of muscle, got lighter colored contacts.” I sighed. “Nothing like going to grab a pair of jeans and you come face to face with a life-sized poster of your brother’s abs.” I smiled whenshe looked up. But she didn’t return it. I’d never seen her this solemn in all the years I’d known her. “You should hear the way Sophie talks to Model Griffin whenever she sees him. ‘Blink twice if they forced you to wear skinny jeans and pretend you read books.’” I made my voice high-pitched like my sister's.
But Magnolia didn’t laugh. Not even a little. Her expression remained carefully guarded.
Her laughter was oxygen, and I was suffocating without it. It sharpened colors and softened edges, making the whole world feel good again—so I kept trying. “Last time we were there, Sophie slaps him on the cheek—or at least she tried—hard to do when he’s two-dimensional—and says, ‘Mom says hello. And also, she wants her cheekbones back.’ Then she turns to the entire store and hollers, ‘Y’all, that’s my brother. Look at that jawline. God really said, ‘Let me waste this on someone who still eats Dino Nuggets.’”
Finally, Magnolia gave me a quick giggle before reining herself back in.
“Oh, Sophie,” she said quietly. "I miss her.” She peeked up at me. “Does he still eat Dino Nuggets?”
I shrugged. “Your guess is as good as mine.”
Her expression was downcast. “He doesn’t talk to you?”
I gave a slight shake of the head and made myself smile. The ache of not having a relationship with my brother hit me like a rogue wave. Same as always. I doubted I’d ever get used to it.
She stared at my shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Bowen,” she said, as if kissing me was the worst mistake of her life. “You’ll never know how sorry.”
I’d never heard an apology that hurt more.
Chapter Eighteen
BOWEN
At dinner that night,Mom scraped her fork down the center of her plate to purposely annoy me. She was trying everything in her power to make me crack. She did it again, and Dad’s face pinched, like the sound physically hurt.
“Babe,” he said. “You’re going to scratch the plate if you keep doing that.”
“Oh, sorry.” She smiled at me sweetly. “I didn’t realize it was so loud.”
“Sure you didn’t.” Sophie pursed her lips. “Why do you keep watching Bowen like that? It’s creepy.”
Mom swirled her fork, twisting noodles around the prongs. “Like what?”
“Like you’re waiting for him to shatter into a million pieces and like you’re going to laugh maniacally into your pillow when he does.” She looked at me. “Are we in the Twilight Zone?”
“What happened to your hand?” Mom asked for the third time.
“Clem,” Dad said with a sigh. “He already told us.”
“Oh, sorry.” Mom adjusted in her chair. “Wrong question.Whohappened to your hand?”
“I told you.” I sighed like this was getting obnoxious. “Topher Adams happened to it.”
“Interesting.” Mom smirked. “That’s not what Billy said when he called to tell his side of things this afternoon.”
Crap.
“Busted,” Mom said triumphantly.
Dad stiffened. “Billy called you?”
