Page 93 of Untempered
“You were a big fish in a small pond,” I said, reaching for my patience. “Here, boy? The pond is bigger, and you’re at the bottom of the food chain. Keep your eyes off her.”
“The One, the Wife, and the Son,” he muttered furiously, brushing me off, and I let him. “You’re so bogged down in your own fear you can’t see what’s coming.” He stayed in close, his voice low and furious. “The Duke is gone. Your buddies are ‘taxing’ everyone, choosing the shifts they attend, and killing those who disagree. I don’t have to like her to know I’ve sworn to keep her alive, and this isnothow we do that.”
I felt sick. “Use the courtesy your mama taught you, then, when you address her, and we can deal with the next issue.”
He laughed, a low and bitter noise, then stepped back. “I am. I’m using exactly what she taught me. Forget it, Tom.” He turned and stalked off in the direction of his horse. People scurried out of his way.
I wondered if he knew people had fled from Mikus the same way.
When I glanced over, Audrey met my gaze fleetingly, her expression somber. My heart dropped further.
She’d seen the exchange.
Scrubbing a hand over my military-smooth chin, I wished I, too, had somewhere to retreat to. But Audrey didn’t question me when she extracted herself. Not about that.
“There are a few houses that have been turned into storage for bodies,” she said, brushing a stray hair from her eyes and leaving a smear of dirt on her cheek as we wandered back toward the horses. “While they dig graves.”
I’d seen it on the way out of the city. They had tried to put the graves a sensitive distance from the city wall, but they needed road access for the dead carts, and burial duty was unpopular. No one wanted to go further than was needed, and no one had time to, either.
“Logistically, the winter will cause issues,” she went on. “Do you think it’s fair of me to request additional graves dug now, before the ground freezes? I don’t want to be the voice of hopelessness, but if winter comes and bodies are left lying about…”
“Fire cleanses,” I reminded her softly.
“Fire also spreads, and we’ve limited people to control it.” She paused on the edge of the area her horse had been tethered. Chay was with his own big, grumpy beast and hadn’t glanced over. They deserved each other. “I agree it would be a good option, but a pyre for so many would require space and management I don’t have, not to mention transporting all those resources.”
My head ached, and the wind whistled around us. Her shoulders were too broad for a noblewoman, but not broad enough to carry this unaided. “I’m not familiar with burial in situations like this,” I admitted, the words coming from far away. “But I know the corpses can enrich the soil for future generations if we treat it right.” Or we could add some salt and poison it. Let them plow fields to find skulls of their kin. I heard the creak of the cart and the smell of blood and snow.
“I don’t know how long this plague might exist inside a deceased body, if it does at all.” She blew out a breath. “Still, it’s relevant. Hopefully, we’ll be rebuilding one of these days. We’ll need all the help we can get.”
“As you say, my lady.”
She looked up at me, her eyes old in her face. “How are you, Thomas?”
I watched from far away, resisting the urge to lick my thumb and clean the smudge of dirt off her cheek. “I’m well, my lady. Don’t you worry about me. It sounds like you’ve enough to concern yourself with.”
“Oh, really?” she asked, brightly. “I hadn’t noticed anything amiss!”
I didn’t realize it was an attempt to joke until I saw a smile tugging at her mouth, and then I didn’t quite know how to respond. “Yes, my lady,” I agreed, stepping back. “Safe travels.”
They rode out on opposite sides of the trail, and I was glad to see that gaping space between them, though it highlighted the lack of handmaidandsecond guard. Unease tugged at me, so I turned away, hoping that it was never even mentioned, so full were people’s minds.
The rain came that night. Trenches dug by inexpert hands around tents were deepened, fires were fed, and soup was held close. I slept with aching bones and a heavy heart in the tent kept for the guards, but was shaken awake in the early hours of the morning to find we’d suffered our first loss.
Digging graves was no small feat. You had to dig them deep enough that they didn’t get dug up again. It was hard, soul-crushing work. And with the rain and the cold, it was also dangerous work. I had volunteers. We all knew it had to happen. The dead couldn’t just sit. But where to bury them? Not close to the tourney ground—we didn’t need their bodies under us during the festivities next year, should any of us survive. We certainly didn’t want to risk them decaying and adding to the sickness we swam in here.
In the end, we buried our dead in the orchard. Graves were marked with handfuls of dandelions and other posies gathered by children or prettily arranged leaves. I listened to speeches in sunshine, in wind, and with rain dripping off my nose. Sometimes, when there was no one else, I did my best to say a few words. And as my skill increased, I wondered how many more times I’d have the time to stand beside a grave. How many more people would be buried by themselves, with dignity.
CHAPTERTHIRTY-SIX
CHAY
“Rather than try to train a defensive horse, you should first gain its trust by existing alongside it without placing demands.”
~ How to Tame Your Brumby: A Collection of Raider’s Ban Wisdom
Ilet myself into the tower for what felt like the millionth time today, settling yet another basket of coal beside the dense logs deigned fit for the lady to burn. We kept the tower warm, to help Isolde, who Audrey reported was still doing well. I hadn’t seen her. I also hadn’t seen Audrey since yesterday morning, when she’d tried to use the Acting Steward’s influence to gather the merchants, and none had turned up.
I stoked the fire, then glanced up the stairs to her room. I hadn’t been up there since Isolde asked me to train Audrey in the sword, and she’d burst into tears. I struggled to match that woman against the one who’d broken a guardsman’s knee, then choked him until he was unconscious. And I struggled to match both of those people against the woman who’d lit up with joy as her horse charged toward the horizon when she’d dragged me out for a ride the other day.
