Page 148 of Unrivaled
“She told me,” I added, unnecessarily.When we’d been laying together in bed, holding back the cold grip of the plague.My muscles were so stiff I wondered how I continued walking.
“She thinks I failed her,” he said, as if this was a genuine puzzle.
That was it.I couldn’t go any further.My feet stopped as if my reins had been yanked.“Luca, you’ve failed her so many times I’m amazed she’ll still share the same air as you.”
He didn’t seem shocked atthat,at least.“How do I fix it?”
“You ask yourself why it was a better choice to make a child stand on your feet than to confront the foolish expectations put on her.Because it’s the same cycle, Luca, every time.You don’t really care abouther.”
“I—”
“—came tomefor advice,” I cut in, furious.“So shut the fuck up for once and take it, Luca.Youdon’tknow.Youcan’tprotect.What youcando is wonder.What purpose did that dance serve?”
“Her father?—”
“—Flogged her to within a breath of her life the next day anyway.Youisolated her.”He reached for my shoulder, and I snapped my hand up, knocking his palm away.“I’m not your spy or your inside man or your friend, Luca.If you fail or succeed, I careonlybecause it’ll impact her.And right now, it looks like you failing would hurt her a lot less than you succeeding.”
He didn’t look angry or hurt, just focused.
He should’ve been furious.Veins pulsing, fists clenched.BecauseIwas.The anger was storming my system like a herd of brumbies across the planes, kicking up dust, reducing visibility.
His throat would’ve fit in a single palm.I could’ve covered his mouth and his nose with one of my hands.
Just as I’d seen my father do, once.
The thought whipped away some of the rage.Some, but not enough.Not nearly enough.Get it together, Chay.Moons worth of following Isolde’s instructions, of noticing things and letting them go, niggled at me.
I couldn’t let it go.Not properly.The rage stuck like shit to my boot.But I tried.He stared at me, and I tried.
“You thinkI’mmore a threat than her father?”he asked, slowly, as if the words were an unfamiliar language.
In that moment, in the shade of her orchard with the sound of her voice carrying to me on the gentle breeze, amidst her success, the threat of her father was obvious.We all knew where that was headed.“You’ll keep her in shackles her whole life,” I told him.
“A partnership?—”
“It’s nopartnershipwhen one partner hasno autonomy,Luca.”
“I’d never?—”
“—Challenge the people asking her to dance,” I cut in, for the final time.“You’d just tell her ‘stand on my feet, I’ll protect you.’”
I turned away.If he’d grabbed for me again wild horses couldn’t have stopped me from breaking every finger in his hand.
He didn’t.
I’d taken only two steps before Isolde fell in beside me.Herhand on my arm was a welcome weight.“Breathe,” she said.“Keep my pace.”
I did both of those things, letting her guide us back to the horses.I knew what she was doing, and while I appreciated the company and the solidarity, my rage wasn’t going to vanish just because she hadn’t given in to hers.
Mayhap that was what we needed.
“They’re trying to crown him,” I told her.Surely Audrey had.Or had she been so upset with me at the time she’d had no words?I felt sick.“Take La’Angi, take the western army, take the west.”
“Who?”she asked.I couldn’t tell if the question was true confusion or mockery.
“Luca,” I said, because I had no time for games anymore.Because, even if Audreyhadtold her, they hadn’theard.
She glanced over her shoulder.“Them?Crown Luca?”
