Page 63 of Unrivaled
If I went up there and she’d forgiven me, I couldn’t hold out.All Thomas and Kaelson’s truths, all the horror…I’d end up dead, my oath igniting me.That alone would harm her, wouldn’t it?To see the man she loved burned to death?
So mayhap that would save me?If I couldn’t harm her, and my death would be a harm…
I scrubbed a hand over my face and threw back the covers.
It was the worst logic I might’ve ever come up with, but it did make a skewed sort of sense.Kadan would’ve loved it, and nothing my friend loved was totally beyond redemption.Including me.
Up the stairs I found her alone, sword in hand, practicing footwork.She glanced over as I came in and every last piece of hope in me died.
“Sorry to wake you abruptly,” she said.“I’ve lost a lot of time is all.You can go back to bed after our lesson if it suits you.”
There were no words I could find to offer her because it wasn’t the welcome I was hoping for, nor the one I was afraid of.
I took the practice sword, struggling to wrap my hand around it, stiff and sore and embarrassingly inept even beside her novice knowledge.
And I did my job.
“We’re going into the city this morning,” she told me, as we finished up.“Did you want the day to get settled back in?I can take Steve and Cameron.”
“No.”Who the fuck was Steve?“I’ll be ready.”
She nodded, headed towards the stairs, then stopped.“I’m sorry I screamed at you.”She met my eyes.I recognized the studied lines of the polite mask she put on when she was with people who weren’t her inner circle.“I’m glad Thomas’ family is okay.It reallywasan important task—to me, at least.But I should’ve communicated it differently.”
We were back here again.I watched her go and wondered if she’d cut any throats recently or thrown anyone off the seawall unassisted.
“Audrey,” I said, hurting.
She stopped, turning to me.“Yes?”
“I’m sorry, too.”
I didn’t know what I expected.It wasn’t the vague sadness that flickered over her face, or the resigned shrug.“We’re well matched then.I’ll let you ready the horses?I’ll be a little while still.I’m breaking my fast with Yasmine.”
That was it.A small acknowledgement, a little kindness, back to business.Behind my ribs my heart stampeded helplessly.
Had her heartbeat even raised a little?I couldn’t tell, not during my half-assed tutoring or my clumsy apology.
On the way down the stairs, I saw her by her dressing table, tugging her shirt out from her breeches.She didn’t hesitate when she saw me, but she did turn away, clearly aware I was there as she lifted the shirt over her head.
The strong lines of her arms, the defined musculature, the breadth of those shoulders—I tore my eyes away.There was nothing inviting about her movements.I knew exactly how Audrey acted when she was happy to be undressed.
And I knew how she acted around acquaintances.
At the bottom of the stairs, Isolde was setting down a tray.Her eyes travelled from the toes of my boots to my crown before she turned away and said, “Light session, I see.You’ve time to fetch breakfast.”
The day, the moon, the year, and then my lifetime all spun out before me.
I pulled on my tabard, belted on my sword, and went to go and fetch food to break our fast.
CHAPTERTWENTY-THREE
ISOLDE
I’m getting nervous.The KA has got me helping to investigate some internal mage fuckery.Problem is, once you know shit about the mages, you’re never given the chance to share it.I've half a mind to see what the mountain air is like this time of year.—S to Man in the Mountain
15thDay of Spring’s One Moon,
Age of the Locways, Year 272
