Page 118 of A Female Alpha for the Lycan Prince
Say thank you to Marius.
And then, because I just can’t help myself, I add,
How is he doing?
Liam’s answer comes swiftly.Glad it helped! Good luck, Celine. If you need backup, call me. Glad my father is with you.
Another message follows,Mari’s relieved he was able to help. He’s sleeping now. The road to recovery will be long for him.
I nod to myself, feeling relieved. I try to push my feelings for Marius aside, as the last thing I want is the mate pull kicking in again because my mate has shown five minutes of decency towards me.
Still, I’ll never forget Marius lying there on the brink of death, and how Liam was so pale and haunted by his discovery when searching through Marius’ mind. And then there is what Danica said about his wolf, hinting at something changing Marius into the person he is now.
I shove my thoughts aside for now. Valerie needs her alpha, not a love-sick pup. Harmony, Elden, Eric, and Garret are coming with me to meet Jade’s group at the base of the mountain. Unfortunately, I can only bring a handful of warriors with us in order to keep the element of surprise. I need only stealthy, silent killers this time. We arrive at the foot of the mountain to discover that Jade’s found a way to break through the barrier.
Desmona is sitting in one of the jeeps resting, a warm blanket around her and a flask of tea in her hand. My grandpa is sitting next to her, looking exhausted. It’s obvious that their age is affecting them. Meanwhile, Jazz and the twins are standing in their assigned positions. Jade has drawn a huge circle into the snowy ground, with each of the girls now occupying one. There are several runes between them, all of which are glowing.
As I approach, Jade turns to me. She points at a fourth circle, and without questioning it any further, I take up a position there. I wasn’t expecting to participate in the ritual, but I’ll do what I can.
Close your eyes,Danica says.Have faith in us.
I do, feeling how the air around me sizzles, and the energy bubbles over madly like a kettle that’s letting off steam. It’s completely quiet around us, not a single creature or plant moving in the wind. Jade’s voice breaks through the silence, chanting spells in a language I can’t understand. For the first time I can remember, I feel like I need to let go of my control, and allow things to happen to me, and around me. I allow the atmosphere to pull me in.
When I open my eyes, it’s like the curtain has lifted. Instead of the rough terrain that was in front of us, now there is a physical barrier, the one that’s preventing us from moving further up the mountain. I don’t see the others anymore, and I feel some invisible string pulling me out of the circle and toward the barrier.
It’s completely silent except for the sound of my breathing, the beating of my heart, and Danica inside my mind.Have faith in yourself, Celine. Have faith in yourself.
I reach my hand towards the barrier. Did mom really have to die? I am not sure why I think of her suddenly, but I can’t stop my thoughts from running through my mind. Could I have protected her had I known about my gifts? Could grandpa have done something? Whose fault was it that she died? I should have been able to use my powers. Dad should have saved his mate. Grandpa should have protected his daughter. And Jade… she should have been there for all of us.
Let it go,Danica says quietly.Let it go, Celine. Accept it for what it is.
An accident. An accident, and it’s no one’s fault,I think bitterly.
Yes.
I wish she were here, I whisper.I needed her. With growing up, leading the pack, handling dad… Marius. I wish she were here to help me.
Me too,Danica says soothingly.
I miss her,I mutter.I want my mom.
It’s okay. The pain is a part of you, and always will be. Allow it to be part of you.
When my mother died, I cried, and then I never cried again. Never like that anyway. I made sure to be the daughter my father could rely on. To be the successor he needed. To take responsibility for the pack as everyone expected me to. I was the perfect daughter, the diligent student, the responsible heir, and never once did I show anyone how I truly felt.
I follow Danica’s guidance, allowing myself to feel everything I normally keep locked away inside. I feel sorrow for my mother, who I still miss so much. I feel the pain from my broken mate bond. Finally, I feel immense anger and hurt towards Marius, who should have loved me unconditionally and filled the void in me but refused. Maybe that’s what I needed to learn. I wanted a mate to fill a void that no one could fill. Even if things turn out well with us, this part of me will always be missing.
My senses return to normal as I reach my hand toward the barrier and watch it burst around me. I turn to see the others are deathly silent around me. Jade, however, has tears in her eyes, and I wonder how much she felt or saw while watching me right now.
“Let’s go,” I say.
And just like that, the moment is broken. Everyone scrambles to their feet, except for Grandpa, Desmona, and Jazz, who I order to stay behind. “But I can help,” Jazz begs, “Alpha?”
“Jazz,” I say earnestly. “We don’t know what awaits us in there, I cannot take the risk. Besides, Valerie will need someone waiting for her out here with something warm to drink and a blanket once we have her.”
Jazz nods her head with a sigh. “I understand.”
Jade steps aside for me to go first. “Lead the way,” she tells me.
