Page 110 of An Enigma for the Lycan Crown Prince
“That’s not what I am worried about,” I admit. “It’s- I never thought my mother was still alive. Grandma was vague when she talked about her, but I thought it was because she didn’t want to tell me how she died. And now, I suddenly know she has been here all along. I have been talking to her and meeting her.”
Ersa is quiet for a while. “I don’t know how humans feel, I don’t always understand it,” she finally admits. “And sometimes I have difficulties grasping their emotions, but I know that I have always loved you, and I will always love you.”
“And my father?” I ask.
Disappointment flashes over Ersa’s face, giving me more of an answer than her words do. “Not in my wildest dreams did I imagine him leaving. But he did. And since I lost my human form and a lot of my powers, I wasn’t able to reach out to him anymore.” She pauses. “Maybe I could have found a way, but I’d rather use my remaining strength to meet you. Hazel, however, she was everything.”
“She really was,” I say quietly, feeling deep gratitude for the way Grandma was there for me, and looked out for me with hernever-ending kindness. She did everything for me, and I will make sure she won’t regret it. Even if she can’t see me anymore, I want her to be proud of me.
thirty-five
Time for a Search
*FLORA*
When I wake up again, Elden is lying next to me, my heart filling with relief that he is here. I swore to myself not to be selfish and not to demand his constant presence, but he is here despite me not asking for him. He is here because he wants to be here, because that’s how much I mean to him. With all the stress going on, he still took time to be there for me.
He stirs slightly. “You are awake,” he mutters.
“I didn’t want to wake you up,” I say quietly. “You should sleep a bit longer.”
“There is no time for that.” He stretches and sits up to take my hand. His eyes are slightly red from being sleep-deprived. I know there is no use in pointing it out to him though, he knows. Iknow. But there is nothing we can do about it, because his father has worked the pack almost to the ground, and the only reason it didn’t collapse is thanks to the Elders and Elden himself. He can’t just take a break, neither can I. No matter what happens, who we lose and how much we get hurt, we need to keep going.
“I want a big family,” I say into the silence.
Elden looks at me, surprised. “Where did that come from?”
“Just been thinking. One day, I want many children. I know that when having many children there is a danger of neglecting them, but I will make sure to pay attention to all of them. I will also make sure to love them all and be thankful for every day they are in my life.”
“Yes, I want a big family,” he admits. “I was all alone for years. I don’t want my children to have the same experience.”
“We will get through this and then make lots of babies,” I tell him.
“Ireallylike the sound of that.” Elden smiles, nuzzling his nose into my hair. He pauses, pulling back slightly before burying his nose into my hair again.
“What are you doing?” I chuckle.
“It’s just… you still smell the same, but there is something new in it, a hint ofsomething.”
“Oh, right. I met Ersa in my dreams, last night,” I explain. “She comforted me and talked to me. Everything I tell you now is top secret. But, I told her I wouldn’t keep it from you, even if the deities throw a fit. Well, I found out she is my mother.”
Elden stares at me. Just wordlessly stares. He looks at me without saying a word.
“Elden? Everything okay?”
“You are an actual deity?” he finally asks.
“Nah.” I make a dismissive gesture with my hand. “I am just half.”
“Isn’t Ersa Selene’s daughter?”
“And Zeus’s,” I add nonchalantly.
“This is crazy,” he gapes. “I mean, it’s incredible and amazing, but also insane! No wonder you are so strong and have such distinctive powers.” He slaps his forehead. “I knew there had to be a relationship to Ersa, but I didn’t think she’d be your mother!”
He is right. Now that I talk about it, and hear myself say it out loud, it is insane. Suddenly, it also dawns on me why Ersa was so hellbent on making sure I only talk to those I trust, because this is one hell of a secret! A truly dangerous one. But who do I trust? Who would I entrust my life to? Elden and Grandma were the only people I’d name in a heartbeat. Now it’s only Elden. I love my friends dearly, but entrusting them with my life is a whole different story. I take Elden’s hand in mine. “We can’t tell this to anyone,” I say quietly.
“Obviously not,” he backs me up instantly. “This is the secret Hazel kept for so long that she didn’t even share with the Elders. She didn’t tell anyone, not even you.”
