Page 129 of My Broken Mate
I love you two,
Remus
Chapter forty
My Mate
*KAT*
When we finally get out of the tub, the water has turned cold, so cold that both of us have begun to shiver. I can’t let go of Remus, I can’t even let go of his hand. I want to continue holding him. Once we are dry, he cups my cheeks. “I can understand if what I just told you changed everything for you and—”
“No,” I interrupt him fiercely. “It changed nothing! Actually, I might even admire you more for how you persevered and kept fighting.”
“I didn’t put up much of a fight,” he says quietly.
“You did. You survived!”
“That’s not much,” he says.
“It’severything. I wouldn’t have met you otherwise! You survived that monster, you are still here, and you are still fighting every single day. The fact that you get up every morning is proof of that.”
He shifts his gaze to look at me. For the first time since he told me his story, he looks me directly in the eyes, and I make sure he can find everything he is searching for. “You know I love you,” I tell him. “You are everything to me. And just for the record, you saved me, too.”
Remus’ thumbs move over my cheek. “How so?”
“I had no confidence at all,” I say. “My self-worth was completely dependent on other people. I was chasing every word of praise, only feeling like I did something well when someone told me so. It’s like I didn’t exist otherwise, if not for the people around relying on me. I would take on any task, help out whenever someone needed help for whatever it was, just to have them like me. I still have a long way ahead of me, but… I was able to take the first steps into building my confidence because of you.” I pause. “My stepmom was abusive whenever no one was looking. She made sure to crush my confidence. All her anger for my father’s cheating, she took out on me.” I pause. “I know it’s nothing compared to your story, but—”
“It’s not a competition, Kata,” he says. “Your trauma matters just as much as mine!”
“Joel and Eve don’t know,” I tell him. “When Dad would gift me something, she would destroy it. When someone said something kind to me, she made sure to tell me how useless and pathetic I was.” I clench my fingers into fists. “One day, Dad gave me a cat. A day later, the cat was gone.”
He stares at me, shock all over his face. “No way, she didn’t!”
“It’s crazy, huh? She hated me so much, it wasn’t enough for her to take it out on me, she had to take it out on an innocent, helpless creature.” I swallow thickly, trying to keep my mindin the present and not have it slip back into the past entirely. Remus’ hands are on my shoulders now, his touch so grounding and comforting. “The worst thing is that I can understand where she was coming from…”
“No,” he intervenes. “She had no right to take her anger out on you. You were an innocent child. Instead of lashing out at the person who deserved it – your father – she took it out on the one person weaker than her. A child. Nothing about this is right. She had options. But she chose to be abusive instead.” He pauses. “I know why you are telling me this. You are saying you don’t mind what happened to me, and that I am still the same to you. But I am not. I am really broken, Kata. I am utterly used and broken and…”
I grab his face, forcing him to look at me. “Look me in the eye and tell me I am lying,” I challenge him. “I love you. And I will repeat it as often as you need to hear it. You are not broken. You are everything to me. I won’t allow your psychopath of a father to haunt you even in his death. His spirit is already rotting somewhere because no one misses him. In a few years, he will be forgotten entirely, because all of you will have moved on, thriving and happy simply because he isn’t here anymore. His existence ended, and I am sure the shadow looming all over you three will continue vanishing, too.”
“Goddess,” Remus chuckles. “I can’t help but fall in love over and over again with you when you talk like that.”
“That’s the plan!”
“Things won’t always be easy with me,” he says. “I have a long way ahead of me. I just want you to know.”
“I know. But I have no intention of going anywhere.”
I can see his walls crumbling, his whole stance relaxing. Then he suddenly scoops me in his arms. “I wish one day you would mark me.”
My heart almost jumps out of my chest. “Are you kidding? I was ready to mark you since I knew for certain that we were mates.”
He pulls back a little. “Is that true?”
I nod.
“Does that mean you would mark me…”
“Tonight?” I ask. “Anytime.” When he stays silent, I gape. “You actually mean it!”
