Page 137 of My Broken Mate
“And no WIFI signal, or any signal,” he adds.
We both chuckle.
“And I kind of like my siblings,” he says.
“’Kind of’“ I quote.
“You know what I mean,” he smiles.
“And you think they put two and two together and know where we are?” I ask.
“Yes, I am sure Sean will piece it together. He is the only one who knows this place. And I think, back then, it was quite a traumatic experience for him, too. He had to retrieve my mom’s body. And he tried so hard to console me.” He pauses. “And you really think that Joel and Eve will both come rushing here?”
I laugh. “They are insane,” I say. “They will absolutely come.”
Talking about our families definitely pushes us to finally get up. We clean up with the ice-cold water of the stream, which is a whole new challenge, and then get dressed again. We didn’t bring a ton to eat, so we use what the cabin has to offer.
I follow the instructions of the old lady and take off the sheets and put them into one of the bags, then I do the same with all the other laundry we used. Meanwhile, Remus lights a small fire to make tea for us.
Soon, we sit next to each other in front of the small bonfire. I don’t say anything, just wait for him to take the next step. I know what he came here for, but I don’t want to push him. Remus takes my hand and squeezes it slightly before taking out the letter from his mother. “She was in a hurry when she wrote it,” he says. “I still don’t know why she didn’t take me with her. I guess she couldn’t do it.” He pauses. “A part of me resented her for keeping me alive, for not taking me with her, and forcing me to live in the hell that was my life.”
I slip closer to him, resting my head on his shoulder. It’s not a long letter. Remus is right, she probably wrote it in a hurry, scared that her alpha mate would find her and drag her back before she could take her life, scared she might change her mind to stay with her son or worse, decide to take him with her.
My sweet Remus,
Forgive me.
Please forgive me.
Forgive me.
She has scribbled these words over and over again, almost filling half of the page with them, some lines blurring into each other. She must have been close to losing her sanity when she wrote it. My heart breaks for Remus, having to face the proof of how far into the abyss she’d already fallen.
Of how far his father pushed her into it.
The lump in my throat becomes too thick to speak, so I wrap my hand around his arm, holding onto him to give him the support he needs.
Her writing gets clearer in the second half.
You are my only pride. The only person in my life who managed to bring back the light. You are everything.
Remus lets the letter sink down, taking a shaky breath. For long minutes, neither of us say anything. “He took everything from her,” he says. “You should have met her before she broke. She was kind and fun, smart, and she smiled. She smiled a lot. He took everything from her, like he always did. He destroyed everything he touched. She wilted, and I couldn’t do anything about it.”
“He was a monster,” I say. “None of this was your fault or hers.” I pause. “Are you going to tell Sean and Gabe?”
“I don’t know how much to tell them,” he says. “I don’t want to hurt them more than they already have been. Dad broke them differently than he broke me.” He intertwines our fingers. “What about you? Are you going to tell Evander and Joel what you told me?”
“Like you, I don’t know,” I mutter. “They loved their mom, and she loved them. I don’t want to tarnish their memory.”
Remus shows me the remainder of the letter.
I’ve not achieved anything in my life. I fell into the trap of that man, who would take our freedom and peace. But I don’t regret that it gave me you. You are the only good that came out of this. You are kind, caring, blessed with a good heart and a strong mind.
No matter what happens or what the future brings, I hope for you to remain this sweet person. I wish for you to achieve all your dreams, to find someone you can love to the fullest, and no matter what happens, I want you to remain the person you are. Always honest to yourself, with your beautiful, gentle heart.
“I think in her twisted mind, she maybe believed that Dad would forget about her when she died,” he tells me. “Maybe that’s why she didn’t take me with her in the end. She might have believed that once she was gone, his obsession would leave, too,and that he maybe would find another woman to toy with. She didn’t know that his obsession would shift from her to me.”
Closing my eyes, I can see you as an adult, as the person you will become. Someone will bring the light into your life, like you did for me.
