Page 142 of My Broken Mate
“Of course. You will make a great ally for me. Another alpha won’t be able to use his power over you and push you to submit. That’s a very handy talent to have, Remus.”
His praise makes me feel so much lighter. It still feels so good to hear his or Gabe’s approval. Maybe it’s silly, but I have been deprived of any real praise for so long that it makes my confidence grow whenever I hear them approve of something I do. “What about my mother?” I ask him. “If this kind of strength is in our blood, how come that monster managed to ensnare her?”
“Maybe he didn’t,” Sean says after a while. “Maybe he wanted to. He was obsessed with her after all. Looking back at the situation now, he did constantly isolate her. I don’t know what he managed to do to her, but it must have been horrendous.”
“That’s true,” I say quietly, thinking of my mom’s letter and also of my own memories of what happened. He did anything to hurt her; he pressured her and threatened to hurt me so she would submit.
She was stronger than he thought she would be. And when she couldn’t take it anymore, she killed herself before she could do real harm to me. Or before he could fully have her.
And once she couldn’t protect me anymore, Atlas took over and wrapped himself around my mind like a blanket to ensure I could keep on living and surviving.
“What are you not telling me?” Sean asks, his eyes thoughtful as he watches me.
“What you said before is true,” I admit. “I remember some instances of my past. He had a hard time making her submit.” I clench my fingers around my robe, not sure how to continue.
“I didn’t mean to pressure you,” Sean says. “You don’t need to tell me or Gabe anything that you don’t feel ready to. I told you, we will do this at your pace.” He tilts his head. “Still, everything aside, this gift of yours is truly useful. Please tell me, you are considering working as my advisor, at least.”
The last words come unexpectedly to me. I know, as the alpha’s brother, I will always have a certain standing in the pack, but to be considered a ranked member or an advisor, being blood-related is not enough, at least not for Sean. “I… Are you sure you want me to work for you?”
“Of course,” he says. “Gabriel is mostly working for our businesses; that’s where he excels, and that’s what he likes the best. But for you, I see a much more active part in the pack, if that’s what you want.”
“I’d love to,” I admit. “I just have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. I was so useless up to now—”
“You never were useless,” he tells me. “You were always incredibly smart.”
“Gabriel is smarter.”
“Yes, he is smarter than any other person I know, but you have other strengths aside from being smart. You are very aware of your surroundings. Your social interactions were never awkward.”
“I never noticed,” I admit. “I constantly felt exhausted.”
“And yet, you managed to socialize. Besides, even without your wolf, you were able to set boundaries and have others follow them. You never were someone others easily walked over.”
It’s still incredibly hard for me to accept any compliment, even from my brothers… even from Kata, sometimes. But I decide to take this at face value. I know they wouldn’t lie to me. Seanwould never compliment me when he didn’t mean it. Neither would Gabe, nor Kata.
“Thank you,” I say. “I will try to internalize everything you said more. And I do want to help you with the pack.”
“Fantastic!” Sean smiles. “Now, how about we pick up Gabriel and go out for dinner?” he offers. “I don’t know about you, but I am hungry.”
“No kidding,” I say. “I feel like I am starving.”
“We have been training for over two hours now,” Sean says. “I guess we deserve a nice break.”
“While we are at it,” I say. “There is something I want to discuss with you. I am not sure if you will like it… but, there is something I want to do.”
“And what’s that?”
“Kata and I won’t be fully moving in together yet, but we are…” I take a deep breath, trying to remind myself that if I want to do something, I need to be brave and face my anxiety, instead of thinking I will get rejected immediately. “We said, we’d alternate between packs,” I say.
“That makes sense. You are marked after all.”
“Yes, but that’s not all. I really want to have a fresh start, Sean. If possible, I’d like to move out of the Alpha Suite and into… I don’t know, maybe one of the small cottages or one of the smaller apartments in the packhouse.” I pause. “I would prefer not to stay in the packhouse.”
Sean looks surprised at first, then thoughtful. It’s hard to read him when he is like this.
“It doesn’t mean I don’t want to spend time with you and Gabe,” I add.
Sean nods after a while. “It’s fine that you want to have a fresh start. I am not going to lie, I feel a bit reluctant to see you move out, now that we finally all get along, but I also think it might be good for you.”
