Page 35 of Nauti Boy (Nauti 1)

“She’s old enough to make the choice,” Natches drawled. “You’re going back to the Marines and that’s fine. But if she’s not willing to wait on you, then we aren’t either. Claim her man, or one of us will. ”

She had been like a fire at midnight. He had to make her want to wait on him. He had to ensure her need for him. And he had done that. But in doing it, he had cemented his need for her.

As he held her in the darkness of the night, the soft warmth of her pressed into his chest, he knew her earlier protest was the key to her soul. The romance. She needed the romance, she deserved it, but God knew he had no idea how to make it romantic. He could give her pleasure. Enough pleasure to leave her screaming in orgasm, begging for more. But the heart of the woman needed more. A lesson Loren had taught them, but one they had forgotten over the years.

The women they had drawn to them hadn’t been ones to need the romance, or even want it.

For the first time in his life Rowdy felt helpless. Eliminating the threat to her was imperative. And he wasn’t going to lie to her. Not Kelly. She deserved more than that.

“You’re not asleep. ” Her whisper was as soft as a breath.

“Neither are you. ” He sighed, knowing her mind had been running as fast as his.

They hadn’t said much since that final question. She had drawn in a deep, hard breath, informed him she was going to sleep then curled into his arms, and turned out the lights. But she hadn’t gone to sleep anymore than he had.

“Why do you do it?” she finally asked. He didn’t have to ask what she was talking about. It was a question he had hoped she wouldn’t ask. Yet he had known she would.

He slid his hand from her hip to her stomach, feeling the muscles flutter beneath his palm.

“A man’s pleasure comes from his woman’s,” he whispered. “Because we learned how much better it can be for a woman when no part of her body is neglected. Because we learned as young men how much easier it is to protect what’s ours when we work together. Hell, Kelly, I could give you a thousand reasons and none of them would really make sense. Because it’s who we are, what we are. ”

“Will it end?” He knew where she was going, what she would eventually ask.

“Only if you want it to. My needs aren’t more important than yours. It won’t be every time. It won’t be an either-or. ”

She was silent for long moments. He closed his eyes, grimacing in painful awareness of the can of worms he had opened.

“And when they find the women they want for their own? What then?”

“It’s not an either-or,” he repeated. “I’ll do nothing you can’t live with, Kelly. Ever. ”

“But you’ll want to. ” Her voice lowered further. “If Dawg or Natches found a woman they wanted for their own, then you’d want to be a part of it, wouldn’t you, Rowdy?”

“I wouldn’t miss being a part of it, anymore than you would miss their touch after having had it. ” There was no way to reassure her, and God knew he wanted to.

He felt her flinch against him.

“You would touch another woman?”

“I would never do anything that would jeopardize us. ” That wasn’t acceptable. “Ever. Not at any time. ”

As he stared into the darkness, he thought of her touch, her kiss. Could he touch another woman? At any time?

“So it would be my choice?”

“It would be your choice. ”

“But you would still want to. ” It wasn’t a question.

“I don’t know. ” He couldn’t lie to her. He wouldn’t lie to her, even though he was terrified of losing her.

He caressed her abdomen as he held her, as silence filled the room once again.

“This might not work. ” Her voice trembled with an awareness of what she might be looking at. “I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know if I could handle your need to do it. ”

He sighed heavily into her hair, drawing her closer, knowing he could be risking both their hearts with the hungers that tormented him. It was the reason he had left four years before, the reason he couldn’t begin this relationship with anything less than the truth.

“I can live without it,” he told her softly. “I don’t know if I could live without you, Kelly. Not now. Not after the years I’ve spent needing you. I’ll give you everything I am, as much as you want. That’s all I can do. ”

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