Page 83 of So Not My Thing
She ran an eye over both of us, her expression thoughtful. “I told you, my sister’s the psychic. I don’t have any talent with divination. I do intuitive readings. I’d say you need a three-card reading. If that sounds good, come sit down.”
Miles took the seat across from her, and I hung back awkwardly, not sure how the rules worked if I wasn’t getting a reading.
“Come on,” Heather said. “I don’t bite.”
“Is that okay even if I’m not getting a reading?”
One of Heather’s eyebrows went up. “Sit down,” she said, her voice firm but kind. I sat. She looked from Miles to me and back again. “Y’all have a distinct energy. You’re definitely getting a reading together.”
She went to the cabinet, and Miles shot me a grin. I smiled back, glad that things had been easy between us this evening.
Heather resumed her seat and set a wooden box carved with vines on the table. She opened it and removed a deck of large cards and set them down in front of her. They looked old and well-used. “This is the Rider-Waite-Smith deck. Let’s begin.”
“Just like that?” I asked, confused. “Don’t you need to ask us some questions?”
“Like what?” she asked as she shuffled.
“I don’t know. About our childhoods, or maybe about our jobs and hobbies?”
She shot me a knowing look. “Why? So I can do some basic conning where I make educated guesses on the information you give me to convince you I’m the real deal?”
“Busted,” Miles said, trying not to laugh.
“No,” I said. Her eyebrow went up again. “Yes,” I admitted.
She fanned the cards. “That’s not how tarot readings work. I don’t make any guesses. I interpret in a general sense what the cards reveal. It’s not going to give you the winning lottery numbers or the name of your future husband. Let’s begin.”
Her fingers skimmed the cards, touching a couple before she drew one and turned it over. It showed a cloaked man on a horse with a wreath around his head. “This card is your past. It’s the Six of Wands reversed. This means public recognition, but in a negative way. The kind that may have happened long ago but that still affects you now.”
Miles’s eyebrow shot up, but I fought the urge to scoff. She’d obviously recognized both of us and knew about the viral moment.
She skimmed the cards again and chose another. “This card is for the present. Five of Cups.” She studied it, looked between us, then back to the card. A man in black stood on a riverbank, staring down at five chalices around his feet, two standing, three tipped over. “Interesting. I’d intended to do a pair reading, but your energy seems to be driving the cards tonight, Elle. This card reminds you that you need to leave the past in the past. Mourn it but look toward the future.”
“Like our walk down to the river the other day,” Miles said. “We did that.”
I wasn’t impressed, but I didn’t say anything. That was another easy guess, the kind of thing that could be true based on how either of us wanted to look at it.
When she turned the third card, she gave it a long look as a smile played around her lips. “Well, well, well.”
“What?” Miles asked. I leaned forward to see it better in spite of myself.
“Are you two together?” she asked.
“No,” I said while Miles shifted uncomfortably in his chair next to me.
“But do you want to be?” she asked, and heat flooded my cheeks. I didn’t want her to say whatever she was about to say. “Because it looks like you’ll get a couples reading after all. This is the Two of Cups. It symbolizes the beginning of a new relationship, one that is balanced. It will be strong with equal energy on both parts. It reflects attraction and a great deal of potential for a committed, monogamous relationship. It’s the card lovers are happy to see.”
I looked down at the card. It had far more going on than the other two. A man and woman stared into each other’s eyes, each holding a large trophy-looking cup. A caduceus topped with a lion’s head hung over the goblets. The Two of Cups, she’d called it. I didn’t dare look at Miles. Was he trying not to laugh? Feeling stressed that she’d pretty much announced I was madly in love with him?
I wasn’t even sure what to do. Get up and walk out? Find a joke to make? Deny it?
I went with option three. “Nice try, but you probably should have asked those getting-to-know-us questions. If you had, you’d know you’re way off base.”
Instead of looking offended, she simply collected the cards, efficiently tapping them into a neat deck. “I didn’t ‘try’ anything. I interpreted what the cards said. Believe them or don’t.”
“Thanks for the reading,” Miles said, reaching for his wallet. “And ignore my friend here. I think she’s still hangry and her stomach hasn’t told her brain yet that they’re both fine.” He tossed a hundred-dollar bill on the table. Seriously, was he made of them? I glared at him and headed for the door.
“What did I do now?” he asked when we hit the sidewalk.
