Page 10 of Betting on the Best Friend
Has that often looked like me backing her up against a wall and kissing her until she can’t remember her own name? In my imagination a thousand times, yeah. I’d already been thinking about how to move us there, but with this bet suddenly in play, I’m going to need to come up with a real plan fast. Like, yesterday.
“How did this go down?” I ask. Without question, this plan will be well-intentioned (Sami) and most likely borrowed from a harebrainedFriendsepisode (Madison). Unless Ava’s involved, in which case, due to her common sense and deep understanding of Ruby, their plan might be an actual threat to my goal of me plus Ruby forever with hearts around it or whatever middle school kids and emo librarians are doodling these days.
It’s hard to force Ruby to do anything without incredible leverage, but there are a few things that always work. “Did they use guilt or pride to trick you into it?”
“Pride,” she admits. “Madison told me they all love having me as their permanent third wheel.”
“Ooof.” Shout out to Madi, the best button-pusher in their house. Well, after Ruby.
“Anyway,” she continues, flipping through another book at light speed, “they said that even if I don’t find a good match, I’ll at leastlooklike I’m having fun in case Niles thinks I’m moping over him.”
“Got it. This is where you do it for the ‘gram?”
She nods. “I’m supposed to post all my adventures to show I’m a super funtime happy girl.”
“Do you think you’ll have fun for real or have to fake it?” I hold my breath for the answer I want.Fake it, fake it, fake it.
She stops flipping pages and considers the question. “I’ve always ended up dating people I get to know through class or whatever, so at worst, it’s an interesting social experiment. Goout with someone to see if I could like them instead of going out with someone because I already like them.” She frowns. “It doesn’t sound smart when I explain it that way.”
She closes the book in her hand with a loud snap. “They say I need to go on two dates a week for optimal social media proof to Niles, his mom, and any of our mutuals. When did I became shallow enough to care about the opinions of people I don’t talk to?”
“A lot of people would care if their ex was making a big deal about moving on.” I feel her eyes on me, so I look up to meet them. They remind me of brown agate, and they snap, sparkle, or shine, depending on her mood. Right now, they glint with curiosity.
“Would you?” she asks. “I can’t see you caring if one of your exes posted something like that.”
“Probably not. But I’ve never had an ex get engaged at the same place where they proposed to me first.” It’s not that I’ve never had a serious relationship. I had one in high school and one halfway through college. But nothing like five years long.
“I still can’t see it bothering you,” she says. “You are so chill about everything.”
For as well as Ruby and I know each other, this is one of her blind spots; I’m chill aboutalmosteverything—except her. “That’s me. Chill Charlie.”
She sighs and picks up another book to skim. “Each roommate can only set me up on one date a week, and I won’t go on more than two in a week, so the dates go to whoever sets me up first. Sami says she and Josh are a team, and they’re going to start with the single guys at his firm.”
That’s fairly safe. Josh, their neighbor and Sami’s boyfriend, works at his family’s huge law firm. Most young lawyers I know are the kind of cocky Ruby loathes.
“Madison says she’s going to have her friends at Gatsby’s keep an eye out as a backup, but her main plan is to have Oliver scope out his tech connections.”
Madison is a full-time MBA student now, but she used to work at Gatsby’s, a nightclub, and it’s doubtful her girls will spot the right guy for Ruby since I don’t go to Gatsby’s. Threat level: none.
Oliver, on the other hand, is a good judge of character. His company is killing it, and he’s much more likely to know people who take their jobs seriously and act like professionals solving real problems, not trying to develop apps to solve problems no one has. Threat level: moderate.
“What’s Ava’s plan? Grow you the perfect man in her lab?” Since Ava is the friend who’s known Ruby the best and the longest, my money is on her finding Ruby the closest thing to the right guy who isn’t me.
“Ha. If that worked, she would have done it for herself instead of dating my stupid brother—who, by the way, wants nothing to do with this bet.”
“Strange that Joey doesn’t want to watch his little sister go on a bunch of dates. Can’t imagine why.”
She pauses in her spine skimming to tilt her head. “Does it bother you when your sisters date?”
“It didn’t bother me when Megan and Lucy dated, and they both married good dudes. But I’m suspicious of anyone Becca dates.”
“I’ve never heard you say she picks bad guys.”
I shrug. “She doesn’t. Big brother reflex.”
“Excellent logic, Charles.”
“Like Joey is so logical about it?”
