Page 39 of Betting on the Best Friend
But I have tips
Tell me at work
It’s a couple of minutes before she answers with a thumbs-up emoji.
I grin. “You are now a hot commodity.”
But by the time I’m on the road to Enchanted Rock, I’m scowling.
What does she mean, I “need tips”?
That’s exactly what I ask her when I get to our cubicle Monday morning. She’s wearing a short-sleeved sweater that’s not even tight, but it’s reminding me of all her curves. Plus it’s a pale gold color and kind of furry looking? All I know is that it makes me want to pet her, so I slide my hands into my pockets when I stop in front of her instead.
“Good morning, Ruby Tuesday.”
Ruby glances up. “Morning, Charlie Bucket.”
“What tips do I need for dating?”
“Work isn’t the place for this,” she says. “Too bad you couldn’t come for dinner last night. I made shrimp and pasta.”
She doesn’t have to say it was good. Ruby is amazing in the kitchen. “Why isn’t work the place? Work is always the place.”
“You’ll see. We’ll talk about it at the desk.”
I put my stuff away and drop my lanyard over my head. We go to our sections, turning on lights and computers and doing our usual morning tasks. Ruby manages to avoid me until I find her at the media wall looking for a DVD to pull for the holds. She’s wearing brown pants thathaveto be yoga pants based on the way they sculpt her butt, except they have belt loops and back pockets. Ruby just has those kinds of curves, and what that booty does to jeans should be illegal, thank Levi Strauss.
I clear my throat to let her know I’m here, and she glances over her shoulder at me.
“The tips, Ruby. Or can you still not talk about it at work?” I give a quick look around before I lean down and ask softly beside her ear, “It’s illegal, isn’t it? I’ll be your accomplice for anything, but I won’t be the perp.”
Ruby gives a small shiver and steps back, rubbing her ear. “That tickles.”
I wait, saying nothing.
She drops her hand to her hip, a classic Bossy Ruby pose. “It’s one tip: you need more PDA.”
She wants me to touch Sydney more? This isn’t the direction I want her head to go. I push aside a sinking feeling to focus on my mission objectives. “Why can’t you say that at work?”
“I was going to give you specifics that might sound weird out of context to anyone else. I didn’t want to give anyone the wrong idea.”
I’m intrigued. “Everything we say sounds weird out of context.”
She gives ayeah, okayside-to-side nod. “Anyway, she sent you a lot of signals, but you didn’t send many of your own. If you go out again—”
“We are,” I say. We aren’t, but Sydney and I agreed to say we are.
“Oh.” Ruby gives a small head shake, like she’s reorienting. “That’s great.”
“Why did you say ‘oh’ like it’s not a good idea?”
“Too used to my brothers and their rules about mandatory wait times between dates and all of that.”
I give her a thumbs-down.
“I know,” she says. “You see why I had to help Joey. I can’t believe any of them found a woman.”
“Especially since they’re all ugly and boring.” Every Ramos is attractive and funny. It’s obnoxious but also deeply fun to hang around them.
