Page 167 of The Secret We Keep
You’re never going to get better.
“Stop talking to me. Please, leave me alone.”
“Look at me, Morgan. I’m right here. You’re safe. No one’s going to hurt you.”
I open my eyes a small amount, seeing the worry in Paddy’s eyes.
“You’re safe. I’ve got you.” He strokes a thumb over my cheek.
“They won’t leave me alone,” I whimper, feeling hopeless. Helpless.
“They will. You can make them stop.Wecan make this all go away. You’re not on your own. I promise.” He drags me into his arms, holding me tight.
I dry heave unexpectedly, my body shaking as Paddy holds me so tight, I know I’m not going anywhere. “And Holly? Did she leave?” My breath snatches in my throat.
His body goes rigid.
Forcing myself back, I look up at him. “Did she go?” I look at the busted door, seeing my mum sitting on my bed. She’s crying into her hands as my dad wraps his big arm around her.
What’s happening?
Looking over his shoulder, Paddy follows my gaze before looking at me.
His eyes are swimming. “Yeah, curly fries. She’s gone.”
“We argued. I should apologise before she goes.”
I try to stand but Paddy’s strong hands lock together. “She’s gone, Morgan.”
“I can catch up with her, let me go.” I try in vain to get out from under his hold.
“Listen to me, baby. She’s gone. She’s not coming back. Not now. Not ever.”
We're not awful parents
Paddy
“What?”Morganchokes.
I can’t believe I’m looking the girl I love in the eyes and telling her the truth. “She’s dead, baby.”
The words float around us. Raw. Shaky. Real.
And it’s quiet. Painfully, quiet.
My shoulders drop. The weight sliding off them. My lungs pull in fresh breaths of air. She knows. Finally. There’s no more hiding it.
Her eyes zone out as she looks at her parents, eyes wide in her silence like I just rewired her entire world.
I wish they’d told her sooner.
Now is not the time to blame them for trying to keep something like this from her. I understand that they thought they were doing the right thing. It’s a hard, bitter pill to swallow, but somewhere inside of me, I get it. I fucking get it.
Because feeling her body beginning to shake in my arms has my blood turning thick and ice cold. She looks so confused. So unbelievably scared and helpless, that I’m not sure forcing her to face her disorder head on was the right thing to do.
I saw the early warning signs when she was frantically getting dressed at the hotel. I talked to her, knowing she couldn’t hear me. Iknew that the tide was shifting, and in that moment, I knew getting her home was myonlyoption.
Nothing else mattered.
