Page 21 of The Secret We Keep
“Not for me they didn’t.”
My face lights up. “This one did for me. You know, I tried my first cigarette with Holly right here?”
His eyebrow raises in a look of surprise. “Badass,” he teases.
I let out a quiet chuckle at him playfully mocking me. “Yep. Also had my first alcopop in here, too. I was so sick, I thought I’d have to sleep in here.”
Paddy sniggers. “That’s right. I forgot you were a lightweight.”
My cheeks heat, embarrassed. “Still am.”
“And there was me thinking you only came here when you were sad.”
I suck in some air. My smile slowly fading. “You remember finding me?”
He steps closer. “Pretty hard to forget the state I found you in, curly fries.” His fingers brush a wayward strand of hair off my face, forcing me to hold my breath.
That night in particular wasn’t great. I’d argued with Jerry and was struggling with my revision. It was too much. After getting it in both ears from my dad, I let my legs carry me to my hiding place. Finding me soaked in tears and stressed from life, Paddy took me home and gave me his old school books.
He made things okay. Always did.
“Yeah, well. That was then.”
“And how are things now?”
I continue walking, chest expanding. “Okay, I guess.”
“You guess?”
“Things are what they are, Paddy.” My tone has shifted. I’m no longer in the mood for talking.
“Morgan?” he presses.
I don’t know why I get the feeling he won’t let this go. “What?”
“Talk to me.”
“Why?”
He balks. “I don’t know. Maybe because since I got back here this morning, everyone seems to be on my case about talking to you like it’s some sort of big deal.”
“Well, it’s not.” My pace quickens along the darkened road.
Paddy’s right beside me in a heartbeat, matching my speed. “Well, something’s wrong.”
“Nothing’s wrong, Paddy,” I throw at him. “Everyone is just sticking their nose into business that isn’t theirs, same as always in this place. You know that.”
“Then why are you getting upset?”
I shrug defensively, hating that we’re arguing like this. “I’m not.”
“Don’t lie to me.” He holds my elbow, trying to stop me.
A million sparks shoot up my arm. It’s as if time pauses to allow my skin time to memorise his touch. Looking down, I blink and pull myself free. “Don’t push this like it’s any of your business then.” I take a few more powerful steps, noticing that Paddy doesn’t follow. Every part of my soul wants to keep on marching, keep walking away. Better yet, I want to go to the old oak tree or sit in this bus shelter where the outside world feels like it can’t touch me.
I don’t look over my shoulder but wait until I hear Paddy’s footsteps coming to a stop just behind me. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”
My lashes sweep up and down, but I’m not worried about any tears falling. I haven’t cried in so long, I don’t think I can anymore. “I know.” We begin moving in silence until I offer my truth. “It’s my dad,” I say quietly, before exchanging a knowing look with Paddy. “We had an argument.”
