Page 73 of The Secret We Keep
“See you then.”
I watch her walk away and use my key to get inside the house. After a brief catch up with Mum, I pass Dad in the hallway as I make my way up the stairs.
“How’s it going?”
I turn to look at him, a little taken aback by his question. “With the job?”
He nods.
“It’s fine,” I reassure him, seeing the same old worried look etched into his features. He doesn’t believe me. “Really, Dad.”
When his head drops, a small part of me wants to reach out and hug him. I stay put as though I’m glued to the floor. “I’m pleased to hear it.” He’s stern, but he glances my way, his face softening momentarily.
I don’t say thank you. I don’t even smile back. Instead, I nod his way, returning his usual stoic approach. “I’m going out later. I need to go change.”
He looks up at me. “Who are you going with? Holly?”
“Yeah. We’re going for dinner and maybe a drink after.”
He pauses before he asks, “Where are you going?”
I take a breath. “I don’t know yet. But when I find out, I’ll let you know.”
“Thank you,” he says, like I owe him. I guess I do still live under his roof. But does that really warrant having to constantly let him know where I’m going?
And people wonder why I stopped going out and doing things. Things are so much simpler when Holly and I stay in. The only reason we’re going out is because she wants to know more about Paddy. Apparently, our forty-five minute wait at the bus stop wasn’t long enough.
Come to think of it, this is all on him.
If he hadn’t come back, we wouldn’t have anything to talk about, therefore no need to leave the safety of my house.
Gritting my teeth, I shower and change, trying my best to put Paddy out of my mind. I skip applying make-up and throw on a dress and my denim jacket, slipping my feet into my Converse for comfort.
When I check my phone, I find a text asking me to meet Holly at the pub she’s picked. It’s unlike her, but I know how busy she is with these final papers she has to hand in. If I wasn’t so pent up about Paddy and these ridiculous feelings that I have for him, I would probably be more worried about having to go out on my own again. Luckily for me, I’ve walked some of the route enough lately with Kevin to know where to go.
I should be fine.
Rum and Coke, please. Actually, make that two
Morgan
Iwalkedforfortyminutes until I arrived at the busiest pub just outside of Stoney Grange. They shouldn’t be, but my nerves are fried.
It was around the five-minute mark that I’m pretty sure I started being followed. Maybe it was trickery of the night because I didn’t see anyone. I could have sworn the same car kept driving past, though. Too scared to look properly, the only thing that kept my feet moving was imagining I had Kevin with me. Not that he would have been much help if someonewashot on my trail, but purely because I enjoy his company. I didn’t feel so alone, believing he was there.
The general hum from the hustle inside had me wanting to turn back, but I was caught on the big stone step out the front of the pub when the door swung open. Seeing no way out, the tall man stepping outside for a cigarette held the door open for me to go inside.
So, feeling a little shaky from my solo walk, that’s exactly what I did.
And I have been sitting here, my hands hidden in the depths of my jacket, and my knees knocking together in the corner of the pub, watching different people come and go, without a single sign of Holly. I’ve called her. I’ve texted. But I’ve heard nothing.
The only saving grace is that most people here don’t know who I am. They’re either too old or from too far out of town to know the real locals. That’s why I agreed to eat and have a drink here.
As young teens, we preferred drinking in places we really shouldn’t. Park benches, bus stops, the old cenotaph on the cricket pitch, they were our usual hangouts.
Maybe if I had come here more as an adult, I would feel more comfortable. Right now, the background noise has drowned out as though my head is underwater. I can’t hear conversation. Can’t make head nor tail of what’s being said. It’s in the side-eyes and the heads turning my way that I know people are staring at me.
I should be used to it, but being away from home and on my own, my blood feels like it’s turning to ice.
