Page 39 of Kane's Awakening
My mouth watered. I took a seat beside my dad—who sat at the head of the table—and Mom sat in front of me on his other side.
Before every meal, Dad said grace. It was something we’d always done as long as I could remember. Growing up, I’d spent every Sunday morning in church, waking up at the ass crack of dawn so we could get there early and get Dad’s favorite pew in front of the preacher’s podium.
When I’d gotten older, I stopped going all the time, and I’d pretty much rebelled against it. But my parents loved me unconditionally, even when I came out to them. They’d never mistreated me for my sexuality or said I was going to Hell.
They just loved me. And that was kind of beautiful.
We took each other’s hands, and bowed our heads.
“Heavenly Father, thank you for all the blessings you’ve bestowed upon our family,” Dad prayed. “Thank you for the food we’re about to eat and for bringing us together on this day. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
It was silent as we loaded our plates and dug in. Not an awkward silence by any means, though. We were the type of family that could talk ninety-to-nothing one moment and then be quiet and all in our heads the next.
“So, Kane, what’s been going on with you?” Mom asked after several minutes. “Any new men in your life? A doctor perhaps. Or maybe another officer on the force?”
“Tracy,” Dad said, shaking his head at her. “Leave the boy be and stop your pryin’ into his love life.” He wasn’t actually bothered. It was clear in the way the edges of his eyes crinkled with a smile. “He’s still too young to settle down with any regular old Joe. Let him have fun and see what all the world has to offer first.” Then, he looked at me. “Just make sure you’re careful and use protection.”
I nearly choked on a carrot.
Hearing your parents discuss your sex life was just one of those horrifying things you never wanted to happen. I didn’t embarrass easy, but I was sure my face was fire-engine red right then.
“God, Dad,” I groaned and rubbed the back of my neck. “Can we please not talk about that? It brings back the awful memory of me being a teen when you gave methe talk.And the damn banana.”
“Kane, no swearing at the dinner table,” Mom said.
I apologized and Dad chuckled.
He was one of those dads that loved to torture their kids; not literally torture, but humiliate at all possible times and scare the hell out of. He used to put on an old man mask, stuff a pillow under a blanket on his back that made him look hunchbacked, and hide, jumping out and scaring the shit out of me and my friends before chasing us around the house.
From my seat, I could look out the window and see the back field. Molly was still running around with her tongue sticking out the side of her mouth. She stopped and started rolling around in the grass, and I smiled.
“You watch that dog like she’s your child,” Mom pointed out with a laugh.
“She is,” I said before taking another bite of roast. “Probably the only child I’ll ever have, unless I get another. You’ll be a grandma to a litter of fur babies.”
Although she tried to hide it, I still saw the slight disappointment in my mom’s eyes before she looked away and grabbed her glass of tea. My sexuality wasn’t an issue with her, but she had told me several times in the past—before I came out—that she couldn’t wait for me to have kids so she could spoil her grandbabies.
And she’d never have that.
By the time I left my parents’ house, it was nearly nine o’clock, and I drove home, feeling happy that I’d gotten to see them and have such a great visit. But I also felt… empty. Ryker’s face came to mind, and a weight settled on my chest.
Goddammit I missed him, and not just the sex either. Him. His voice, his laugh, the way he smelled, and just how he made me feel when I was around him. I was too screwed up for him, though.
He needed a prince charming, and I was nothing but the damn frog in the swamp. I’d never be good enough for him.
Finally back at home, I tried to play a game on my Xbox, but I couldn’t stay focused long enough, so I shut it off and decided to shower and just go to bed. I should’ve known I wouldn’t even find peace in my sleep.
Devon kissed the back of my neck as he fucked me from behind. He felt so damn good inside me, and his gentle kisses on my nape just enhanced my desire and did something to my heart. I turned my face to the side in the attempt to capture his lips with mine, wanting more of this tender side to him. Wanting to be more in the moment with him and not just the hole he used to get off.
“Don’t fucking look at me,” he snarled before forcefully turning my head back around to face the mattress. “You know the rules, Kane.”
He thrust into me again, hitting all the right spots, and I moaned. But tears still stung the corner of my eyes, even through my pleasure.
“Shit, I’m gonna cum,” he said, pressing his face against my shoulder and quickening his pace. The bed squeaked and the force of his thrusts made it bang into the wall. “Fuuuck, Kane.”
Knowing I was the one who made him moan in that way filled me with pride, and I wanted more than anything to see his face in that moment—to see the pleasure I gave him—but I knew I couldn’t. So I kept facing the mattress like I was supposed to.
His dick brushed across my spot and I whimpered as warmth shot down my spine and I came with a slur of incoherent words.
“Why can’t Vanessa get me off like that?” He pulled out of me and sat back on the bed, his back against the wall. “I have to close my eyes to come when I’m with her.”
I pushed myself up and rested against the wall, too, grabbing the sheet and covering my junk so it wasn’t all out on display.
“Why are you even still with her?” I asked in a whisper and peered at him. “Am I not enough?”
Icy blue eyes glared at me. Strange how he could appear so cold and also have such fire in his gaze at the same time.
“Don’t be a dumbass,” he answered before getting off the bed and going to his drawer to grab clean clothes. “You know the answer. This is all you get from me.” His dark hair fell across his brow as he looked back at me—a destroyer angel, both beautiful and lethal. “I’m gonna take a shower. You can see your way out.”
