Page 62 of Kane's Awakening
Chapter Eighteen
Ryker
The past week had dragged way too slow for my liking. I’d had court on Tuesday for the big injury case, and even though I hadn’t gotten everything I had asked for in damages, it had still been more than enough for my client. More than I’d expected. Now that it was over, I could relax and focus on smaller cases that were coming up.
I could also afford to live a little. So, Saturday evening, I was with Max.
It was our second date and he’d invited me over to his apartment for dinner. Apparently, the guy could cook, which was a nice surprise. Normally I was the one doing all of the cooking, with the exception of when I went to Anna’s. He’d made steak, homemade mashed potatoes with white-pepper gravy, and a side of country-style green beans.
“I hope you liked the food,” he said once we’d finished eating, cleaned up, and sat on the couch with a glass of wine.
Yes, wine. Max had really gone all-out that night.
“It was excellent.” I rested back on the couch and tilted my head to look at him, gently rubbing my stomach with my free hand. “I might die. I’m stuffed.”
Max smirked before taking a sip of his wine, keeping eye contact with me over his glass. Dang, I knew that look—flirty and basically asking to fuck with just a stare. Kane had given it to me too many times to count.
Kane.My heart skipped a beat at the thought of him, remembering how he’d called me two days ago. I’d been harsh over the phone, and I’d regretted it right after I’d hung up on him. But I couldn’t deal with his games anymore. I refused to be used as a sex object.
I miss you, Ryker, he’d said. And something about the way his voice had cracked on my name had made my chest ache.
“You okay?” Max asked, furrowing his brow.
“Yeah. Sorry.” I shook my head and exhaled before looking back at him. “Just zoning. It’s been a long week.”
“Wanna know a good fix for that?” He set his glass of wine on the coffee table and leaned closer to me, brushing his knuckles down my cheek. His hands were soft… which of course made me think of Kane and howhehad rough, but still soft, hands. “A good massage.”
He kissed me then, and I just kind of froze.
His mouth was warm and inviting, but it didn’t set me on fire. After the shock faded, I returned the kiss, moving my lips in sync with his. But even though my body responded to him, my mind was elsewhere.
I was making out with Max, but my thoughts were with Kane—wishing they werehislips I was kissing. That made me a crappy person, too.
When Max placed a hand on my thigh and started massaging my leg, gradually inching closer to another part of me, I grabbed his hand to stop him.
“Max… I can’t.” My words nearly made me laugh, only for the pure absurdity of them. I’d had sex with Kane not even fifteen minutes after meeting him. Then, had more sex with him in the weeks following. However, he was different. Max wasn’t. “I like you… Ireallydo, but I’m not ready for more.”
Jesus, I sounded like Kane, but that infuriating, stubborn, and slutty cop was all I wanted. I’d tried to be the type of man who jumped from one guy to the next, but I realized in that moment that Icouldn’tbe that guy. I’d never be him.
“That’s okay,” Max said before pulling back a little and rubbing at the corner of his mouth. I’d felt how much he wanted me, but he didn’t look pissed at all at having to stop. “I’m sorry it was too fast. We can go at your pace. I just thought it was worth a shot, just in case.”
“It’s fine,” I reassured him, wondering if I was stupid for turning him down.
He was everything I’d wanted in a man—apart from him being younger than my preference. And yet, I was pushing him away because of my feelings for a guy who’d probably never return those feelings.
Damn Kane and him having to call me the other day. If he hadn’t called me, hell, I might’ve saidwhy notand let Max do me right there on his couch. Instead, I couldn’t get Kane out of my head, and a part of me kept askingwhat if.
What if Kane had been serious over the phone? There’d been so many times I thought I’d seen something more spark in his eyes when he’d looked at me, something that was quickly hidden behind his cocky behavior.
What if he was finally ready to try?
“Thank you for a great evening,” I told Max, standing from the couch. He stood as well. “Dinner was amazing, and I really enjoyed your company. It’s getting kind of late, though, and I have to be up early.”
“Okay,” he said, crossing his arms across his chest and bouncing a little on his heels. There was obviously something he wanted to say. “Did I do something wrong? Apart from trying to grab your dick and all?” He laughed a little on that last part, as did I. “I just like you, Ryker.”
“I like you, too,” I replied, putting my jacket on.
Max softly smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Is there abutfollowing that?”
