Page 129 of Kane's Awakening
We met each other’s stares and burst into laughter… which made me cringe. My wounds were mostly closed, but I still had the occasional internal pain and discomfort. The bullet that had hit near my heart had caused me a shit load of trouble while in the hospital, but thankfully, the doctors had been miracle workers and had saved my life.
“Fuck. Okay, no more laughing,” I said, holding my stomach. “What’s this permanent plan of yours? You’re not gonna propose or some shit, are you?”
Ryker was the only man I ever wanted, and I’d come far in my relationship-phobia. Commitment wasn’t an issue for me, and I trusted him. That didn’t mean I was ready for wedding bells and all that crap, though.
Not yet, anyway.
“No. Not marriage,” he said, continuing the rubbing of his hand on my leg. The movement caught my attention, and I watched his hand, wishing it was rubbing something else of mine. It had been way too long since I’d felt him in that way. “But… I did find some land for sale not even ten minutes from here. Fifteen acres with a nice farmhouse sitting on it for a reasonable price.”
Lifting my gaze, I met his. “Whoa, for real?”
“It’s what you want, right?” he asked, seeming uncertain for the first time since he’d sat down on the couch. “You told me about wanting to grow up and live on the farm, train horses, and be in the country. I guess this is my way of trying to give that to you.”
The beating of my heart became sporadic and warmth flooded my chest.
“Is this a bribe?” I asked with a suspicious squint of my eyes.
Once I’d woken up in the hospital and wasn’t as out of it with the pain meds, Ryker had asked me to quit my job. The first shooting I’d experienced had crippled me with anxiety and had nearly made me hand in my badge for good, and he worried about my mental state. But the second one had the opposite effect on me.
Even though I hated being called a hero—I was just a regular guy doing my job—I did have a different attitude. Yeah, my job was dangerous, but the good I did outweighed the risk for me.
“Not a bribe,” Ryker answered. “Although, if youdochange your mind about being a cop, I wouldn’t complain.”
The smile he threw me was teasing, and I smirked upon seeing it.
He might worry, but I saw his pride when looking at me, and I knew he’d never stop me from doing something I loved.
“How long do I have to decide?”
His smile became sheepish, and he rubbed at the back of his neck. “Um, I already bought it.”
“What?” I asked, shocked as hell.
Blue eyes flashed to me, and he continued talking so fast it was hard to catch it all. “You don’t have to move in with me if you don’t want to, and you can take as much time as you need to think about it. After visiting your parents, I fell in love with the quiet, country life, and it got me thinking about how I’d love a small speck of land of my own someday. Having you there with me would just make it complete. So, when I saw the cheap land and foreclosed house, I checked it out and snatched it up while I could.”
I was speechless.
Our relationship had been threatened with misunderstanding not too long before, and I’d believed he and I were never going to clear the air. I’d believed I’d lost him.
And now he’s bought us a house.
“Is this out of guilt?” I asked before looking down at my lap. “Because if it is, you don’t need to do this. I forgave you for the shit that happened. If I’d come over to your house in the morning and saw a half-naked guy walking around, I would’ve freaked, too.”
When I looked back up, there was hurt in his eyes.
“Idostill feel bad, but this has nothing to do with that,” Ryker said, lifting my legs so he could stand. He knelt down by the couch and interlaced our fingers before lifting our joined hands and placing a kiss to one of my knuckles. “This is because I love you and want you with me. When I’m not with you, it’s like I count the minutes until I can see you again. You’re in my head, soul, and heart, Kane Matthews, and where you are, I need to be.”
Expressing feelings was new territory for me.
Over the weeks, Ryker had said plenty of mushy things, and I’d returned the sentiments, but it still made me feel awkward. The side of me that had been rejected by Devon still tensed up in those situations, just waiting for the moment when everything turned to shit.
“You’re kind of amazing sometimes,” I said, knowing my words weren’t as great as his, but his smile told me he didn’t care.
“Only sometimes?” he asked, arching a brow.
“I think I’m havingdéjà vu,” I said, staring into his blue eyes.
“You sure you know what that means, Sir Fuckington?” Ryker teased.
