Page 48 of Kane's Awakening
His truck was in the driveway when I got to his house, and I parked beside it.
What if he’s fine and has some other guy in his bed right now?
I’d be making a fool of myself. Not to mention, that would be like a knife to the chest to see him with someone else, even though we weren’t together. I hadn’t even thought of being with anyone else, but Kane… was Kane, and I could almost guarantee he’d sought out other men for sex.
Yet, even with that depressing thought swirling in my head, I still needed to know he was okay, and I got out of the car, walked up the porch, and knocked on the door.
Molly barked from the other side, and I heard a deep voice mumbling something before saying louder, “Go away.”
“Kane, open the door,” I said, knocking again. “Please.”
Silence. Not even Molly made a sound.
Shuffling sounded before the door clicked. Kane opened it just a few inches and stared at me, confused. He looked rough; pale complexion, red-rimmed eyes and messy hair. But not the sexy bedhead messy, the kind that looked like he’d been yanking on it. My heart ached at the sight of him.
“What are you doing here?” he asked in a voice that matched his appearance.
“If you let me inside, I’ll tell you.” Which wasn’t a total lie. I’d come there to see if he was okay, and while he was alive, he didn’t exactly look okay. His voice was off, as was his whole demeanor.
“Now’s not really a good time, Ryker.”
He had another guy in there.My mind always had to jump to the negative solution.
“I heard about the shooting,” I said, putting my foot in the door so he couldn’t close it all the way. “I… I need to know you’re okay, Kane. I don’t know if you were involved in it, but when my paralegal told me, I was terrified you were hurt. I called you half a dozen times, left a voicemail, and when I still hadn’t heard back from you hours later, I left work and came right over.”
He didn’t say anything. He just stared at me a moment with the most haunting pair of green eyes. I hated the expression reflected in them: nothingness. After opening the door wider, he walked off.
Taking that as a sign to go in, I stepped inside and shut the door behind me.
Kane plopped down on the couch and put an arm over his eyes. Molly went and lay on the carpet beside his feet, watching me.
I slowly approached, just in case she didn’t remember me from last time and thought I was a threat. Once I got close enough, her ears perked back up and she relaxed. I pet her head a moment before taking a seat beside Kane.
We didn’t talk for a few minutes. He sat with his arm draped over his face, and I scrutinized him. Seeing that side of him threw me for a loop. I was used to him being confident, alluring, and silly, but now he was quiet, reserved, and inwardly struggling.
Broken.
“What happened, Kane?”
“I can’t get it out of my head,” he responded, his voice cracking at the end. He didn’t move from his position and still covered his eyes. “The shots. Harry’s blood all over me. How fucking scared I was and how I didn’t think I’d make it through the night.” His body shook, and worry knotted in my gut as his words and behavior registered. “Goddammit, Ryker, it just won’t stop.” When he finally moved his arm and looked at me, there were tears in his eyes. “Make it stop.”
His vulnerability tore open my heart, and I grabbed him, pulling him to my chest. I didn’t know how to make it stop—how to mend his brokenness—so I just held him.
He exhaled and his body shuddered against mine. His arms came around me, and he nuzzled his face into the crease of my neck. “I’m sorry,” he murmured.
“Don’t be,” I replied, gently rubbing his back. “You can’t be strong all the time.”
I still didn’t know the details, but from what he’d said, I assumed his partner had been shot and he’d been part of the bust. And that would be traumatic for anyone. He’d only been on the force for a little over a year from what he’d told me in the past, so I doubted he’d ever been put in that type of situation before.
The thought made me hug him tighter.
