Page 31 of Reaching Avery
Maverick had quite a few inches on my five foot eight height. Declan was taller than me too. I always had to look up a bit when I talked to them. With my brother, it annoyed me, but with Maverick… I liked it. There was just something about being smaller than him that made my insides turn to gelatin.
I returned his smile. “You didn’t think it was weird that I did?”
“Not at all,” he said, unlocking his car. Sarah got in the backseat that time, so I took the seat up front, putting the to-go box in my lap. “Hey, chick, I’m dropping you off first.”
“Fine by me!” Sarah said before pulling out her phone and becoming absorbed moments later.
I’d never had a phone, so I’d probably never see the appeal in whipping it out and ignoring everyone around you as you looked up stupid memes or texted people you could have a real conversation with face-to-face.
Not that I liked people or anything, but if Ididhave friends, I wouldn’t want to stare at a screen all day to talk to them.
Sarah lived not even five minutes away from the main strip, so it didn’t take long to reach her house. When we got there, she told us goodnight and got out of the car.
Maverick waited until she was inside before backing out of the driveway and getting back on the road. A song played on the radio, with a lot of squealing guitars, and he switched it off.
Silence.
I watched him out of the corner of my eye, seeing him driving with one hand while the other rested between us. So much was on my mind, but I kept it all inside, not having the courage to say any of it out loud.
He had a boyfriend, and I had a crush on him, or at least I thought it was a crush. For the longest time I believed maybe I was asexual. There’d been a few guys I’d found attractive before, and some girls I’d thought were pretty, but none of them had been more than that. Once they were out of sight, I’d forgotten them. Sex rarely crossed my mind, which was insane for a guy my age, and I’d never had such a powerful pull to someone before.
Until Maverick.
It hadn’t been instant and had sort of built as I’d talked to him more. He’d been so nice to me, and the news of him being gay had come as a surprise, but I knew he wasn’t into me like that.
How could he be?
“What’s on your mind?”
Hearing his voice, I turned in the seat and was met with his pulled together brows and curious stare.
“Why are you always so nice to me?” I asked, unable to hold the question at bay any longer. It’d been eating me up inside and I needed to know. “And don’t just say because you’re a nice guy. I’ve seen you talk to people at school, but you don’t treat them the way you treat me.”
More silence passed between us, and I was worried I’d upset him.
“How do I treat you?” he finally said, focusing on the road.
It was a two-way street in the outskirts of town, so there weren’t many buildings in sight or other cars. The stars were brighter out there, away from the lights of the more populated areas.
The drive was quiet and almost peaceful, had it not been for my heart thumping so hard.
“You don’t treat me bad or anything,” I said, hoping he didn’t take my words the wrong way. “I just catch you looking at me a certain way sometimes. I don’t know. When we see each other from across the room or something, it’s like everything around me blurs. It’s hard to look away, but the majority of the time, I don’t want to.”
Yep. Pretty sure he’d think I was crazy after that explanation.
“You went out of your way to talk to me when we first met,” I continued, starting to talk faster. “At first, I thought you were just doing it as a pity party, which I hate, but then I wondered if you were playing a game with me. Like being nice to the strange new kid and then turn on him for laughs.”
“Do you still think that?” he asked, and I heard the slight growl in his words, as if the idea of me thinking such a thing was offensive.
It probably was, and after saying it out loud, I was ashamed.
“No, you’re too nice, and you’re far from a bully,” I answered as truthfully as I could. “But I’m still not sure what you see in me. I’m not exactly friendship material.”
“Says who?” he asked, still in that same tone.
Says everyone I’ve ever met.All the different schools and the clusters of students I met at each one—they all made me feel worthless.
I shrugged. “I’ve just never fit in anywhere.”
