Page 39 of Tangled Up In You
The turning point for me had been the moment I’d started irritating myself with my ceaseless overthinking and insecurity. I wasn’t proud of my jealous tendencies and horribly low self-confidence, but it wasn’t something people could always control.
One too many sleepless nights were catching up to me, all because of my obsessing. It was affecting my everyday life, both in and out of the classroom. Luckily, the kids were still working on their research papers, so I hadn’t done any damage there, but if I didn’t take care of it soon, I’d be a complete wreck.
When over a week had passed and I still hadn’t heard from Corbin, I knew it was my turn to make a move. Even if he was still pissed off and told me to leave, at least I hadtriedto do something. To chase him for once.
That night at the bar had aided in my thinking as well. The bartender had told me nothing was impossible and she’d thrown around the wordfate. Crazy that a complete stranger could help me see things a little clearer, but it’d been the final push I’d needed to act.
“Hey,” I said once he answered. Part of me expected him to slam the door in my face. “Can I come in?”
Corbin’s gray eyes watched me with leeriness.
I couldn’t blame him. My mood had been a bit all over the place ever since he’d gotten into town. Kind of like the boy who cried wolf. Now that I’d gone there to try to fix the shithole I’d created, he believed it was some trick.
“Sure.” He opened the door wider. “Um, can I get you a drink or something?”
“No, thanks,” I said, offering him a tight smile. After walking into the house, I stood in the entryway with my hands in the front pocket of my hoodie. I wondered if I looked as awkward as I felt. Probably.
I turned to him and tried to ignore how great he looked. Not wearing a shirt, every damn ridge of his muscled chest and abdomen was on display, as well as those sexy as hell V lines that disappeared below the material of his sweat pants.
His expression remained guarded.
“How are you?” I asked.
“Fine.” He crossed his arms, and I forced myself not to stare at his biceps. “You?”
A lie was on the tip of my tongue. I mean, it was sort of normal to say ‘good’or ‘I’ve been great’when someone asked that question. However, only complete honesty would get us past the damn hurdle.
“Not so good,” I answered before glancing down at the wood floor. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. Too much, actually.”
“You? Overthinking?” Corbin interjected with mock surprise.
I looked up to see him smirking.
“Yeah, I know I’m awful about doing it.” I exhaled and stepped toward him. He didn’t react. He just stared at me, squaring his jaw in that annoyingly sexy way of his. “I owe you a huge apology, Corbin. The way I’ve treated you lately is appalling and you don’t deserve it. What happened with us wasn’t just your fault. We both played a role in breaking what we had.” I searched his face and tried to get a read on his thoughts, but his guard was still up. “I’m sorry for holding a grudge against you.”
Finally, his guard slipped, and for the briefest of moments I saw the pain in his gray eyes. No, maybe not pain. Longing?
“I ran into Mr. Burton at the grocery store the other day,” he said, and his sudden change of topic confused me. “Remember how we used to sneak into his yard and steal apples?” Corbin grinned, but the action didn’t reach his eyes. “I used to get you into so much trouble when we were kids, but you followed me anyway.”
“You were my best friend. Of course I did.” I ached to touch him, but I refrained from doing so. Instead, I stood in place, fighting the urge that I used to give into without a second thought.
We were nowhere near that point of comfortability, though.
Somewhere along the way, we’d gone from best friends and lovers to barely even acquaintances. I’d heard of other childhood friends being that way—being so close and then losing touch after high school—but it was hard to wrap my head around the fact that it’d actually happened to us.
Even harder to accept that I’d been the one to push us to that point.
“I’m selling the house,” Corbin said.
“What? Why?”
“Some things need to be let go,” he answered, not meeting my eyes. “There’re some areas that need to be fixed up before listing it, like a few loose floorboards and some rot damage in the back, so I’m staying here longer to get it done.”
“And then you’ll leave?” I asked, hating the way my heart clenched at the thought.
“Yeah.”
More silence followed.
