Page 2 of Marry in Secret
So what if the rest of the world thought her calculating, cold-blooded and ambitious. She knew who she was. A marriage was made between two people, and if she and the duke were content with—actuallypreferred—a lukewarm pragmatic arrangement, it was nobody’s business but theirs.
“But you don’t know what you’re missing,” Lily began. “Love is—”
“Not for me,” Rose said firmly. She knew exactly what she was missing. And was grateful for it.
“But you’ve neverbeenin love, so how can you—”
“Drop it, Lily,” George interrupted. “If she doesn’t want to fall in love, she doesn’t. You don’t go on about love to me all the time. Why badger Rose about it?”
“I’m notbadgeringher,” Lily said indignantly. “Besides, you and Rose are different.”
“I know—you wouldn’t catch me putting my fortune and my future into the hands of a man I barely know and don’t much like. Or any man, for that matter.”
“On the contrary, I’ll be virtually independent. Cal has arranged the marriage contract and the settlements are very generous. And Aunt Agatha is over the moon.”
George snorted. “Call that a recommendation? Aunt Agatha would happily marry you to a... acannibal, as long as he was rich and titled.”
Rose couldn’t help but laugh. It was pretty close to the mark. “Nonsense. A cannibal wouldnevermeet Aunt Agatha’s lofty standards of behavior. His table manners would be lacking, for a start.”
“As long as he had a title and a fat purse, she’d forgive his peculiar eating habits,” George said darkly.
“It’s not badgering,” Lily persisted. “When we were schoolgirls, Rose and I both dreamed of falling in love—we used to talk about it all the time, remember, Rose?”
Trust her little sister. Lily might not be able to read books, but she could read people, especially her sister.
But Lily didn’t know everything.
“Yes, well, that was a long time ago. A lot has changed since then. I’m not soft and sweet, like you. I don’t want thehearts and flowers. I just want to be married and get on with my life.”
“You know he won’t be faithful,” George said into the silence.
Rose dusted crumbs off her fingers.
“You don’t mind?” Lily said incredulously.
“It’s the price of freedom.”
“Freedom?”George echoed. “To be under a man’s thumb?”
“I won’t be under his thumb,” Rose said. “We have an agreement. I’m to give him an heir, and he will give me the freedom to do what I like, as long as I’m discreet.” Not that she had any intention of breaking her marriage vows. She took her vows seriously.
“That’s horrid,” Lily said, dismayed. “I can’t believe you’re being so... so cynical, Rose.”
“Cold-blooded,” George said.
“Practical,” Rose corrected her. “I used to want too much out of life. I’m more mature now.”
“Oh, but youshouldwant more,” Lily exclaimed in distress. “I never believed I could have even half of what I dreamed of, and then I met Edward. You never know what—or who—is around the corner.”
Rose loved that her sister was so happy, but she knew it was not for her. She leaned forward and took Lily and George by the hand. “Please, my dears, let us drop the subject. I know this marriage is not what you hoped for me, but you’ll just have to accept that I’m a cold-blooded creature who will marry a man she doesn’t love for the sake of freedom, a beautiful home, and a very generous allowance. And babies.” She ached for a child of her own, and seeing her sister-in-law, Emm, so rounded and glowing, her child growing within her...
Lily shook her head. “You can’t have changed that much; I don’t believe it. I don’t understand why you’re doing this thing, and I wish you wouldn’t, but if it’s what you want—what you really truly want, I’ll say no more.”
Rose gave her sister a one-armed hug. “Don’t worryabout me, little sister. I’m going to be just fine.” Dear Lily, so newly married and so deeply, joyfully in love. Of course Lily wanted the same for her sister.
But falling in love was the very last thing Rose wanted. She couldn’t explain why to Lily and George—or anyone else. Not without stirring up... things better left untouched.
Love was simply too painful.
