Page 93 of Snake-Eater
He smiled down at her, benevolent and forgiving. That smile flooded her body with relief. It was okay. She hadn’t screwed everything up. Walter had forgiven her before she’d even realized she had sinned. It was ...
... a reflex, actually. Something that had been etched into her nerves, year upon year. No different than the way Copper automatically turned around in a circle before lying down.
What if she didn’t need to be forgiven?
“How did you find me?” she asked sharply.
Walter’s eyebrows went up. “Your name’s on a house out here,” he said. “Some real estate agent sent a letter offering to buy it. As soon as I got the name of the town, I flew into Phoenix and rented a car.”
Oh hell.She’d known paperwork would be what brought her down, she just hadn’t expected it to be something so trivial.
Walter must have realized that Selena wasn’t reacting the way that he expected, because he reached for her hands. “Selena, it’s okay. I’m here now. We can go home.”
Selena hastily put both hands on Copper’s collar so that he wouldn’t have anything to take. Copper, who knew this human and knew that he had fed her, thumped her tail agreeably. Selena sighed internally. Dogs were supposed to be such great judges of character, but Copper was ruled entirely by her stomach.
Mayor Jenny, who had, until now, been watching silently, pushed away from the pew. “I’m not entirely sure Selenawantsto go home with you,” she drawled.
Walter ignored her. “Come on, Selena,” he said. “It’s okay. It’s just another one of your episodes. You’ve been away so long, and I know it’s hard, but we’ll get through it.” His voice was low and coaxing, as if trying to soothe a frightened animal. And part of Selenafeltlike a frightened animal, felt like she’d been holding herself together for too long, felt like the world had proved itself to be huge and terrible and full of monsters.
If she went home with Walter, she’d never need to worry about monsters again. Snake-Eater and the fetches and the roadrunners would all fade into a hazy memory. And since they couldn’t be real, pretty soon, she’d start to think that maybe she’d actually had a psychotic break or something, and she’d be so relieved that she was home and that Walter could take care of things ...
If she went home with Walter, the world would become a smaller place. No more monsters, but no more vast desert skies. No more Grandma Billy barging through the door with a coffee can full of eggs. No more little green god at the end of the garden, no more potlucksat the church, no more quail for Copper to terrorize, no more radio monologues from DJ Raven, no more drinks on the back porch while the stars blazed endlessly overhead.
She took another step back, shaking her head. “No,” she said.
Walter sighed. His expression shifted from coaxing to kindly exasperation. “Selena,” he said. “You know you can’t stay here.”
“Why not?”
He gazed briefly heavenward. “It’s a historic zone. They don’t just let people move in. And I know people have been very kind, but you can’t keep imposing on them.”
The words poured through her like water, eroding her foundations. It was everything that Selena had ever been afraid of, summed up in one sentence.Imposing.She swallowed hard. She’d done nothing but impose, hadn’t she? Grandma Billy and Lupé’s leftovers were the only reason she hadn’t starved at first and that didn’t even get into how she’d brought Snake-Eater down on everyone’s head. Poor Merv the peacock haddiedbecause of her.
“Iknowyou don’t want to be a burden,” Walter said.
“That’s good,” said a new voice, as the side door slammed back against the wall, “because she ain’t.”
Grandma Billy came stalking down the central aisle looking rather like a bird herself—not a roadrunner, Selena thought, but one of those big secretary birds you saw on nature shows, the ones that looked like dinosaurs and kicked their prey to death. Her bracelets jangled ominously.
Father Aguirre displayed his finely honed sense of valor and got out of the way. Grandma Billy stalked up to Walter, and even though she was at least two inches shorter and thirty years older, she managed to loomupat him.
“And just who do you think you are?” the old woman asked. “Coming in here and telling Selena she’s a burden?”
Walter, who had turned to face this new assault, actually retreated a step, then cleared his throat and tried to pretend that he hadn’t. “I’m her partner,” he said firmly.
“Not anymore you ain’t.” Grandma Billy poked him—actually poked him! Poked Walter! Selena couldn’t believe it—in the center of the chest. “She’s done with you and she’s said she’s done with you, so you got no call to come in here spouting nonsense.”
Selena was standing behind Walter, so she couldn’t see his face, but when he said, “Ma’am ...” and spread his hands, she knew that he’d decided on charm. She winced internally.
“Ma’am, I’m very glad that Selena has made such good friends out here, and I assure you, we both want what’s best for—”
Poke.“Don’t you start telling me what I want.”
“Ma’am, I—”
Poke.“And don’t you go talking about how she’s imposing on me. You don’t know the first thing about me, and I don’t think you know that much about Selena either.”
Walter sighed, a much put-upon sigh, and looked over at Father Aguirre. Selena could have predicted within a raised eyebrow hair the expression on his face. It would be the one that saidYou and I are the only adults in the room and do you see what we have to put up with?
