Page 10 of Fire
Tobias collapsed onto the mattress with a groan, throwing his arm over his eyes. Jake had switched driving with him after the last rest stop, but he was stiff in the way that came from too many hours in the Eldorado.
Jake unzipped his duffel to dig through it for something, then sat down beside him with a sigh that sounded as worn out as Tobias felt. Without opening his eyes, Tobias reached out an open hand, and Jake gripped it at once, strong and warm.
Neither spoke for a few minutes. Tomorrow they would review their security protocols, retrace their steps, try to figure out how they had given themselves away. But that was for tomorrow.
Tobias tugged on Jake’s hand. “C’mere.”
There was just enough space for Jake to lie down next to him, at least when Tobias scooted over and pulled him close, one leg hooked around Jake’s calf.
Jake let out a muffled groan, and Tobias hugged him tighter, looping his arm around Jake’s back. His solid presence was comforting, and Tobias inhaled the space between Jake’s neck and shoulder.
Jake released another ragged breath. “Toby. Tiger.”
It was the first time they’d been this close since Bentham had caught him and they’d had that awful conversation that night. Tobias still shuddered when he thought of it, even though Jake had been so wonderful and said the most incredible things.I still love you.
But he couldn’t shake his deep-seated shame and self-loathing. He didn’t know when or if that would ever happen. It might be embedded as deeply as his freak DNA. But he wanted totryto move past it, for Jake’s sake.
No, for both their sakes.
He wanted to believe he had nothing to be ashamed of, no reason to recoil from Jake’s touch. That hewouldn’tcontaminate Jake.
He knew Jake was being oh-so-careful with him these days, checking with a glance before even touching Tobias’s hand. But when Toby wasn’t in the worst kind of headspace, Jake’s touch was always thebest. That had always been true since they were little kids.
It felt good now. Safe, warm, and also the beginning ache of wantingmore, though he didn’t want to put a name to that desire.
He lifted his head to find Jake’s lips with his own.
The kiss was sweet and exploratory, Tobias’s lips tracing the shape of Jake’s mouth. He pressed closer, seeking full-body contact. Jake’s warm, calloused hand slid over his hip and up his back, and Tobias shivered.
They continued making out, time slipping away under the feel of lips, tongues, hands. Jake kept his hands above Toby’s waist like usual, but Tobias kept tugging him closer with his leg hooked on Jake’s. He wanted to push himselfintoJake somehow, to be surrounded by him, all of his senses filled with nothing but Jake. Maybe he’d get there one day, when they were ready to do this without clothes. Or at least less clothing.
But the next time he rolled his hips forward, with an unpleasant shock he realized he washard.
He pulled away with a sharp gasp, the first hint of nausea and shame rising in him.
In an instant, Jake had caught Tobias’s hand in a loose hold. “Hey. Toby. It’s okay. We’ll slow down, all right?”
Tobias didn’t answer but pressed his face into the thin pillow, trying to control his breathing and heart rate. They’d been here before, and Jake had tried to talk him through it. This was just what bodies did when they felt good and safe and attracted. He wasn’t a gross freak tainting Jake. Jake liked it, wanted them to feel good together. And it was just as okay, asright, for Tobias as it was for him.
Or so Jake told him.
Slowly, Tobias inched back toward him, bringing their lips back together. Kisses were good. So good. Sweet and safe, even when they turned hot and wanting. But Jake kept it gentle and slow now, languorous even, like they had all the time in the world.
Like no one had been on their tail, close enough towatchthem, to even get photographs of them together when they thought they were safe. Like hunters couldn’t recognize Tobias across a room and know exactly what he was, what he was meant for, where he belonged. He shuddered again at the memory of the hunter’s hands on him.
Jake would keep them safe, as safe as they could be, but the world was full of Dixons and hunters andreporterswho had not forgotten either of them.
And Tobias couldn’t fully shake the feel of the hunter gripping him.
He would be damned if he let Freak Camp and those fuckers who ran the place dictate what he and Jake could do to each other, how they loved each other. But tonight was probably not the best time to push himself.
* * *
Alice Dixon gotthe call at two-thirty in the morning. Her life being what it was, she’d only hit her mattress an hour before that. She and some of the higher-ranking members of the family (Jonah, Tina, a handful of others) had been in a conference call with another government agency until late, and then she had typed up her notes and tomorrow’s to-do list before closing her eyes.
“This is the ASC hunters’ emergency service line, you’ve reached Alice Dixon,” she said, enunciating the best she could into the phone. If this was Derrick Yolkov again, looking for a free tow of his piece-of-shit car?—
“We need damage control,” the male voice at the other end snapped. “And we needed it three hours ago.” He rattled off an address about an hour away from her location, closing with “If the cameras get here before you do, we’re all fucked.” And then the line went dead.
