Page 42 of Alpha's Embrace
“I apologize. That is gross misconduct on my part.”
“Even if it is, you keep doing it. I felt your hand on mine. And though I was sleeping, a part of me knows you were here all night.”
He nodded, eyebrows coming together but not as a frown, more like confusion. “I was very worried.”
“I know.” I couldn’t help it, the response popped from my mouth even though I was still unsure.
He swallowed. “We can’t talk like this. We should never talk like this.”
“Why?”
“There is a chain of protocols in place for a reason.”
“I know. This isn’t about protocols. This is something different.”
He turned his head and looked across the bed at the wall by the door. “It isn’t.”
“It is,” I argued. “I’ve never felt like I do now. Like something is missing. It isn’t about the Sylph Burn. It isn’t about anything except--” I stopped, swallowed hard. “Except you. I can’t stop seeing images of you in my mind, and it makes me think I’m losing my mind. But I’m sane. You know this. And so are you.”
He said nothing.
“What has happened?”
“No matter what it is,” he said in a monotone, “it’s wrong. It’s taboo. It’s against the rules and against Alpha law.”
I knew this, but I didn’t want to know it. “Oh.”
It was confirmed then. I was a burden. A problem. Something broken that could never be fixed.
I heard it in his voice. Felt it in my mind. Geo didn’t want me. Couldn’t want me. Any other path would lead to his downfall.
My eyes stung. I held my breath. Nothing would ever change for me. I never thought it would. So why this reaction? Why not fight harder? But not if it meant Geo would suffer. My life was trapped. It couldn’t be over because it had never begun. And never would.
How could I miss something I’d never had?
It was apparent something inside me had changed. Tory had seen it and the result was an attack upon me. Geo saw it and felt it because we were connected. It meant I wasn’t safe. It also meant my freedoms needed to be curtailed again. I’d be like Cedric and Tracy, locked away. Eventually, maybe I, too, would go mad.
“I’m sorry, Misha,” Geo said. “None of this should ever have happened to you.”
I wanted to fight his words, but I couldn’t. I felt them weave into me, his feelings, his despair. I shared it. We were on the same wavelength.
The room became a blur. The ceiling light glared too white. The monitors with their soft hums were too loud. Everything around me became exaggerated in one giant irritation. My wet hair on my pillow felt cold and alien. Even the sheets against my skin hurt.
“I’m sorry,” Geo said again.
“Just go,” I said, hearing my voice as if from another realm.
After a minute, I heard the soft rustle of his clothing as he stood. I heard his footfalls across the hard, tile floor. The door opened and closed.
He’d left me. He’d left me alone.
Chapter Twelve
Geo
“I’d like to see you about Tory’s report.” Once again, I stood in the doorway of Doctor Prim’s office.
“Come in.” He waved his hand toward me.
