Page 36 of Empty Heat
“No. Don’t. Just stop.” I felt a sting begin behind my eyelids along with an image of Lev standing before the sea with the breeze blowing back the thin escapee strands of his hair.It whistles, youknow.I heard his voice in my mind as if he was standing next to me.
I had something inside me that felt the same. Like I was the sea.And maybe if you were quiet long enough, you could hear me from space.Damn, I was in such need. Thinking the zaniest things.
“I won’t say another word about it,” I heard Rhodes say.
“I really want to talk to Lev.” That had just popped out. As soon as I said it, I wanted to take it back.
Silence.
I winced. “Did I say that out loud?”
“Yes.” Rhodes’ voice was soft.
“Oh.”
“I will text you his number.” Rhodes made no other statements. There was no judgment in his tone.
“You will?”
“I told you if you needed anything, it would be provided.”
“So he’s not busy? He doesn’t have another patient?”
“No, Callum. He’s in his apartment. He’s alone.”
“Oh.” I stared at my phone. “And I am allowed to still call him? Even now?”
“Of course.”
“I don’t need to get Senta’s permission?”
“Senta himself told you this afternoon you could have anything you needed at any time. That’s permission.”
“But Lev was taken off my case.”
“Strictly speaking,youtook him off your case.”
“I know.”
Rhodes sounded like he was smiling. “You can say you are calling as an acquaintance.”
“Oh, no. I couldn’t do that.”
“Hmm.” Rhodes’ breath huffed once into the phone. “Of course you can.”
My body began to tense up. My cock bobbed, tugging at my aching balls. While my legs hung off the edge of the bed, I curled my toes into the soft rug.
Rhodes’ calm voice reached me again. “Callum, just call him. Talk. You don’t have to do anything. Say hello. I know you’re hurting. You can tell him that, if you want. He will understand. He’s a very good guy.”
I pouted. I knew that. I was upset at pretty much everyone but him. Yet I’d taken all my frustration out on him.
Rhodes listened patiently while I said nothing. Finally, he said, “I’m going to hang up now and text you his number. Use it, okay? Or if you need to, just call me back and we’ll talk some more.”
I heard the click before I believed it was true. He had actually hung up. And left me to my own devices.
My phone buzzed. Lev’s number shone on the screen.
It was the damn herbs. That was why I was having this problem in the middle of the night. But no, I knew I was searching for any reason to blame my heat on something else. Simply, my cycle had started and come on strong. That was it. No other explanation necessary. It wasn’t the island’s fault, or Lev’s. And the odd construction of my internal sexual organs was no one’s fault, as well. It was just how I was made. The way I was built.
