Page 39 of Empty Heat
“With you, Lev, yes. It’s strange, but is it okay for you to be here with me?”
“Yes. I’m not breaking any island rules, if that’s what you’re asking.” I smiled gently. “I was assigned to your case and even when I walked away, I still adhere to my promise to help you in any way.”
“You didn’t just walk away. I fired you.” Callum’s mouth turned down.
“Yes. Which was your right.” I forced my face to remain neutral.
“I don’t want you to think of me as just a case, though. I want to talk, that’s all. I know what you do and I know how things work and what I signed on for. But I need to lie down. And then just talk.”
“Let’s go.”
Callum led the way to the bedroom, which was still dark. The living room TV, on mute, and one nightlight gave it some coherence, all the shadows brown and gold, the bed a still-made white square with an arrangement of fluffy pillows at the head.
Callum sat at the foot of the bed. I brought the chair forward from the corner and sat facing him. His robe opened again. His skin glowed from his heat.
“I need to lie on my back,” he said.
“You can do whatever you like.”
He collapsed with his head just below the pillows. His robe rode up, exposing dark and secret shadows beneath. He was so lovely and I swore to myself I’d never let any harm come to him.
“Now that you’re here, I feel a little better,” he began. “More relaxed. I mean, the heat is high, but I don’t feel as panicked.”
We’d established a connection. That could not be denied. But I’d honestly thought it had been destroyed when he’d learned of the lie and that I was a surrogate.
I waited for him to speak more, but he remained quiet. Finally, I broke the silence.
“The herbs’ effects will wear off in a couple of hours.”
“I hope so. But they were also not supposed to do this in the first place.”
“Hmm. Yes. It’s rare, but some people drink a double espresso and fall right to sleep, too.”
“Yeah.” He began to roll onto his side. “That’s me. Odd guy out every time. Pills can have different effects on me, too. I should have reminded Rhodes of that. It’s not his fault, though. I told him I don’t like prescriptions, but natural herbs sounded okay.”
He drew his knees up a little. The robe still covered most of his body.
There were so many things I wanted right now, here, in the middle of the night with this man who had just told me he didn’t want me to think of him as a work case. But hewasa case. He was my former patient.
I couldn’t turn that off like a switch. But if allowed, I would lie down next to him, hold my face close to the back of his neck and breathe in his scent. I would run my hand gently down his hip to his thigh and keep it there, like he was mine. I would whisper his name and call him sweetheart, something I would never ever conceive of doing with a patient.
Forest sounds of crickets and frogs seeped through the closed windows. The night outside was windless and hot. Peaceful except for the omega in heat before me. Though he was quiet, I could sense his body’s seething need. It was loud to me but soundless. Like the sea’s whistle.
“Lev,” Callum said. “I want to hear the whistle.”
Had he read my mind?
“Where is your computer?” I asked.
“In the living room.”
I got up and retrieved it, bringing it to the side of the bed. I knelt on the rug and set the computer on the edge of the mattress, searching for the proper site. Quickly, I found it and turned the screen to face him.
He lifted his head and propped himself onto his elbow.
“You don’t have to look. Just listen,” I said.
I clicked the play button and it began. It was short, so I played it several times. He lay very still, his breaths deep and even.
