Page 16 of Omega Island
“Okay,” he echoed. “Thank you for the sunset. I know the way back.”
The sun’s rim was still a hair’s breadth above the waves.
I said nothing as I watched him go, his figure tall and strong, receding between the bluish shadows of the forest path we’d come through to reach the cliff.
Slick thickened against my crack, the pad fighting to absorb it. Raimi. There was no denying that I wanted what I couldn’t have.
8
Raimi
Icould no longer hide the bulge in the front of my kimono. Like the coward I was, I ran. I always ran in the end, didn’t I? Even from Straten instead of standing up to him. Straten had said I was a little kitten grown too big for my bones, breaking when I should stand strong, crying when I should have my chin up and my heart calm at all times. He was right.
I’d said too much to Senta. Now I was frantically trying to remember our conversation, my mortified mind wanting to play it over and over again to look for the mistakes I’d made and try to learn from them. Try to justify what not to do in the future.
I was broken. So why did he ask me to see a sunset with him? He was a smart omega. It didn’t make sense. He said I deserved this retreat when I didn’t. All I needed to do was knock some sense into myself. That was what I needed. Straten would have been able to do that.
I got back to my cabin and texted Hondo.
I’mon a beautiful tropical island with wonderful sunshine, food and privacy, with swimming pools, a golf course, and magical vistas in every direction. I feel I am being rewarded for being weak.
I setdown my phone on my nightstand, not waiting for a reply. He was possibly already home from work, no longer at the office. He was an older alpha, settled with a mate and grown kids. I didn’t expect any response until the morning.
It wasn’t even eight yet, but I turned down the lightweight covers on my bed and began to undo the kimono belt. I draped the garment over a chair while trying to deny the pulsing tent in my underwear, my cock so hard the tip was poking out from the waistband.
A cold shower was in order, though they never helped. At least not for me. And in this climate, a cold shower would feel like a relief. Maybe a hot one would do the trick.
My phone chirped.
Could Hondo be answering so soon?
I picked up my phone. It wasn’t Hondo.
You needsomeone to properly handle you. You want that. You know that. If you come back, we’ll negotiate parameters together. I promise.
I sat hardon the edge of the bed staring at Straten’s words, then scrolling up to see the nearly one hundred texts, all unanswered, he’d sent before this one.
My finger hovered over the block button but I couldn’t do it. I’d lied and told Bam and Luca and Hondo I’d blocked him. He was out of my life. But I’d kept the connection. At least I’d never replied. That was something, right? That was me being strong-ish.
I didn’t know why I still read his texts. They certainly didn’t give me any pleasure. They made my heart pound and not in a good way. They made old scars ache. And yet, Straten was familiar, a part of a world I’d left but still with one foot in the door—just in case. In case of what?
I didn’t know.
I stared at the text, reading it over again a few more times before shutting down my phone to a black screen and forcing myself up and into a scalding shower.
* * *
Hondo had gotten backto me right when I was waking up, having slept late—for me.
Takingtime for self-care is not a reward, it’s smart behavior. You owe it to yourself to take this time to heal from your trauma and make a new path in this world. Treasure your days in the sunlight and fresh air. If you need it, I can Zoom with you later today. If not, our appointment for Thursday still stands.
Hondo’s words,even in a short message, always brought me clarity. I thought of texting him back about a Zoom call. Thursday was five days away. I was bursting with my confusing, turned-on feelings about Senta. I needed someone I trusted to ground me. I didn’t trust myself.
But I was a thirty-two-year-old man. I could handle myself. Plus, Senta would never let someone like me near him even if he was going into heat. I wasn’t even on the same playing field as he was, so what was I thinking?
* * *
After breakfast,the air felt so hot and humid after the middle of the night storm, I decided a swim was what I needed. I had no swim trunks. The clothing I’d managed to pack from Straten’s place consisted mostly of old jeans and t-shirts, underwear and socks. Mostly, Straten had kept me naked. And sometimes locked in a room or, when it suited him, chained.
