Page 8 of A Little Christmas: Rivi
“Of course I didn’t read it carefully. I just signed it.”
“Foolish man. Now you don’t have to worry about it.”
But I did worry. No gifts? Maybe it stated that in fine print in the NDA, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t buy the biggest box of chocolates with a gold bow. That was the way I rolled.
5
Rivi
Irushed home with my packages and into the house. Mama was still at work, so I had the house to myself.
I hopped up the stairs two at a time and threw my new things on my bed. I wanted to open them all immediately and try out everything. But first….
First, I had a party I badly needed to get invited to.
When I came out to Mama, she embraced me and told me she loved me. “All that matters,” she told me, “is that you have love in your heart.” That was when she let it slip. “You know. Your Uncle Trent is gay. If you ever need to talk to someone else, he would probably be a good listener.”
I was shocked. Then weirdly embarrassed. What would I say? Uncle Trent was nice and I loved him, but I didn’t confide private stuff in him, like when I first started liking boys. Sure, he showed up often, especially for special occasions like birthdays and Christmas, always with lavish gifts. He was kind-hearted.But we didn’t really talk about personal stuff beyond school and grades. On deeper levels, he intimidated me a bit.
But now armed with new knowledge—kink knowledge—it was a different story. Uncle Trent owned Club 99. It boggled my mind.
I scrolled through my phone until I came to his name. Probably, I wouldn’t get through immediately. Calls to him always went to voice mail. Then someone I didn’t know would call me back and tell me when to expect a return call from him.
I had no idea what to say. I really didn’t care about Club 99. What I suddenly and desperately wanted was an invitation to his country estate party. If I was ever going to meet someone and feel safe in my surroundings while doing so, it could be there.
He might say no. He might not want to say why. I had to divulge some secrets if I were to get him on my side.
Breathless, I hit the call icon.
Voicemail.
I left a message, trying to sound normal. I felt like I’d just completed a mile run.
Uncle Trent. Hi. It’s Rivi. Uh, hi. Yeah. I said hi twice now, I know. I—I am calling about Christmas. Please call me back soon.
A voice recorder was no place to say anything too personal. Plus, my nerves screamed at me to shut up. To not ask. Not say a word. I didn’t need anything more from Uncle Trent. He’d given me and Mama so much.
I paced the floor of my room as I stared at my phone. I could send a text, too. But that felt strangely intrusive. I didn’t trust my decision-making in this moment. I was still reeling from finding out he was a kink guy. Did he play at his own club? What did he like kink-wise?
Too many questions. I collapsed on my bed amid all my bags of treats and stared up at the ceiling. Maybe it was too soon to open this door.
My phone sang. Trent’s number. I held my breath and swiped answer.
“Hello?”
“Rivi Sebastion?”
“Yes.”
“This is Trent Winterbourne’s assistant. Mr. Winterbourne will return your call at 4:30 p.m. Is that convenient for you?”
“Yes.” My voice shook on that one word.
The phone went dark.
I took a heaving breath.
Again, my brain pelted me with questions. Was I even ready to meet others who might be daddies who were attracted to littles like me? It was my fantasy. But only in my mind. Reality was quite a different thing. I was shy. I didn’t know how I’d react. What would happen if someone liked me in that way? What if they were weird or rough or strange? I could say no, of course. I could run away. I was good at that.
