Page 20 of Duke's Baby Deal
But at the same time, I couldn’t hate it. It wasn’t the baby’s fault at all, but mine, and it deserved the best I could give it. If that meant giving it away, then so be it. I hoped his or her new parents would love it as much as I already did. I was sorry it had to be born like this, unkeepable, a dirty secret that I would never be able to talk about, let alone hold in my arms. But if it meant we could both live, then that’s what I would do.
Late that evening, I heard a knock on the door, which was unusual once the word got out that I was in heat. Unless they didn’t know. But Alpha Norman—the Alpha before Abel—had drilled it into the pack as soon as they knew what I was, and Abel had continued the lessons once my heats had started. I tried to listen in on what was being said, but the voices were too muffled. It was a man, for certain—for a moment, I thought it might have been Duke, but he didn’t have any reason to come talk to my parents. They hardly knew each other, except as adults. Quietly, I cracked open my door, but I could only catch a couple of words here or there. My name—which made me nervous. Night, full moon, a few more that weren’t that important. My heart sped up until my whole chest hurt and I wondered for a moment if I was having a heart attack. Then I heard my father’s voice.
“Bram, could you come down here please?”
My heart was going to explode, it was beating so fast, pounding so I could hardly hear anything else. I dragged myself out the door and trudged down the stairs like I was going to my own execution.
Dad was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, looking worried and angry and scared.
He knows.My heart sank. I wondered who’d told him, then realized it had to have been the people who’d knocked on the door. Had Justin told someone? Was the news of my downfall already spreading through the pack? What would it be like when I went back to work? Would people even let me look after their pups now? I liked my job, even if it was a bit annoying sometimes. I didn’t want to lose it, not until I knew what I really wanted to do with my life.
I came to a stop in front of him, and stared at my feet.
“Is it true?” he asked.
I nodded, but didn’t raise my head.
“Bram…”
“I didn’t mean it to happen!” I peeked up at him, wringing my hands because he looked so angry. I was afraid if I asked him for a hug, he’d say no, even though I desperately needed one. “I was outside playing ball because I couldn’t sleep, and I came back in the yard, and he was there.” I clapped my hands over my mouth to hold back the sobs. This was worse than I’d thought it would be.
“Well, you’re lucky he decided to own up to it, or there’d be even more talk.” He frowned at me and waited.
What? Justin had come back? But I didn’t want to mate Justin, I wanted to mate Duke! Oh dammitalltothedeadlands, what was I going to do now? “He did?” The room spun and my heart sank as my future laid itself out before me. No. I couldn’t do this. I’d rather be a scandal here than Justin’s mate in Montana Border. Maybe Abel would let him stay? No, not Abel, Quin. I didn’t know Quin well enough to ask favors of him, but maybe Abel could…
I didn’t realize I’d sat down on the bottom stair until Dad took my hand to pull me to my feet. “Come on. Best get this over with.”
Something in his voice made me realize he wasn’t just angry, he was sad too, and that was my fault. “I’m sorry, Dad. I really didn’t mean it. I didn’t think anyone would come around.”
He sighed, and pulled me into that hug I so desperately needed. “I know. You never mean it, though, Bram. From now on, you’re going to have to think more than ten minutes ahead, and about someone other than yourself. You’re going to be a mated shifter, and a parent, and that carries responsibility with it.”
But I don’t want to mate Justin!That sentence kept circling around in my brain as my Dad led me numbly into the kitchen. Mom was sitting at the table, looking tired and sad.
The other person seated at the table was the last person I’d ever expected to see—Duke.
“Wha—?” I mumbled, and fell into one of the chairs.
Dad looked at me solemnly. “Duke told me what happened last night. It was an accident—he didn’t find you at the park and he worried. And well, things just got a little out of hand.”
I glanced over at Duke, who was red as a beet and staring a hole in the kitchen table. “Duke?” I said, my voice so timid I almost didn’t recognize it. I was never timid—my reactions to things tended to be loud. But today I didn’t feel like myself.
Dad stood and held his hand out to Mom. “Let’s give them a moment?” He led her out of the kitchen while I stared at the man I’d longed for, like a particularly stupid owl. A moment later, I heard the front door close and I realized I was alone with Duke.
He raised his eyes to mine and smiled awkwardly. “Hey,” he said. “It’s okay. Abel told me everything.”
He couldn’t have. He didn’t know how long I’d been stuck on Duke, how badly I wanted him. Or had—with a feeling of impending doom, I realized that the flutters in my stomach and the urge to climb him and rub myself against his body the entire way up had disappeared. Completely.
The omegas were right.
I covered my face with my hands. “I can’t, I can’t,” I told him, my throat so tight my voice almost squeaked. “You don’t understand…”
“I understand that Justin took advantage of your heat and left you to deal with the consequences.” He pulled my hands away from my face and made me look at him. “This is the plan.”
But, did he love me? Did he want me? I opened my mouth to ask, then shut it in fear. What if he didn’t? Oh, dammit, I was eleven years younger than him. Of course he didn’t. Especially after this—I’d just confirmed all the bad things he probably thought about me. “It’s not fair.”
“No, it’s not. But it is what it is. I hope you won’t be unhappy with me. And if you find someone you want later, we can work out a solution. Maybe by then, Bax will have pushed through some changes in how people treat omegas and you can go find someone who suits you.”
Someone who suits me… All the stress of the past day hit me like a sledgehammer and the room spun around me.
