Page 43 of A Baby for the Firefighter
“Thank you for staying,” Griff said again, as if he hadn’t said that like twenty-one times already. And then he climbed into the bed next to me. “I hope this isn’t too weird for you.”
“It’s fine,” I insisted for the twenty-second time.
He smiled at me, and that infusion of warmth I got from it made all my struggles worth it.
Turning off the light, he settled on his side of the bed, as far away from me as possible.
I couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t bite, you know.” What was I here for if not to hold him?
“I know.” Slowly, he inched a little closer.
I reached out and pulled him against my chest. “Is this okay?”
He was stiff as a log at first, but then he exhaled and relaxed a little. “Yes.” He turned around to face me and his hair tickled my neck and chin. “This is fine.”
“Good.” I kissed the top of his head. “Try to get some sleep.”
“Okay.” He settled in, and I gently stroked a finger through the strands of his hair, hoping to soothe him.
But it didn’t seem that sleep would come so easily. Griff spoke up again after only a minute. “Dean?” he whispered, as if checking to see whether it was okay to talk to me in the dark. I was oddly reminded of sleepovers we’d had as children, telling each other stories after bedtime in hushed voices. Back before I’d fallen for my friend.
Or was there even a before? I wasn’t sure anymore. Looking back, I felt like I’d been lost the moment I first noticed how bright his smile was in elementary school.
And now I was in bed with him, holding him in my arms—if only to comfort him.
“Yeah?” I asked, trying to force my brain back into the present.
“How long are you going to stay in Oceanport?”
Where was that question coming from now? He hadn’t asked me that in a long time, and to be honest, I didn’t know the answer. At first, I’d planned to stay for a couple of weeks, and now I’d been here forever. “I’m not sure,” I said. “Why do you ask?”
He fidgeted a little. “Just wondering how much time we have.”
Oh. I hadn’t thought about that. I’d always just figured that I’d go back to Portland eventually, return to my job, and that Griff would just… actually, I hadn’t thought about that. Our relationship was too new, and lately, I didn't like to think about the future. But when I forced myself to picture it, I definitely wanted Griff in it. He felt so nice cuddled up against me. A comfortable warm weight at my side. One that I didn’t want to lose. “I’m not sure,” I said honestly. “I’m kind of getting used to living here, though.”
“Really?” Griff’s voice sounded hopeful. Of course, if he pictured the same kind of future I did, he wouldn’t want me to leave. I didn’t have to ask to know that Griff wasn’t going to leave this town. He loved his brother and his role as an uncle in the childrens’ lives too much. This was his home. I couldn’t ask him to abandon ship and come to Portland with me.
“Yeah,” I said. “I never meant to stay so long, but I guess I just can’t get myself to leave.”
Griff played no small part in my reluctance to leave, of course, but it was also because I still couldn’t stand the thought of going back to my old job. He didn’t have to know that, though. If he never knew how much today’s events had shaken me as well, that was for the best.
“Does that mean you’re going to stay?” Griff asked, and for the first time that day, his usual cheer seemed to have returned to his voice.
Considering how much I loved hearing it, I really couldn’t say anything but, “Yes.”
“Awesome!”
I smiled. Looked like I’d picked the right answer. Griff slung an arm around my back, as if suddenly encouraged to cuddle closer by my response. I pulled him tight against my chest, and then I made the mistake of breathing in his scent and immediately felt punched in the gut in the best way possible.
God, I could have baked three whole batches of cupcakes and their combined smell wouldn’t have been as sweet as Griff’s. He wasn’t simply my boyfriend, he was mybestfriend, and he was temptation made flesh.
And he really needs you to not see him that way right now. You supposed to sleep next to him, notwithhim.
But knowing that didn’t make my arousal disappear, even while I hated what a perv I was.
Griff looked up, his hair tickling my nose. “Dean?” he asked again, his voice just shaky enough to make me wonder what was going throughhishead.
“Yeah?”
