Page 26 of The Omega's Surprise Baby
I sighed as if this was a great inconvenience. Itkind ofwas. “I don't know if I'll be up for doing whatever it is you got planned after.” The conversation could sour my mood.
Shane contemplated this. Fooling around or hearing my story. Which would he choose? “I still want to know,” he said after only a second or two.
“All right then.” If the choice had been mine, I would have picked differently. At the same time, though, part of me was glad that Shane's interest in me went deeper than hormone-induced lust. Or at least it seemed that way. Why else would he rather talk than make out? Because I was pretty sure I knew what hissomething crazywas. “You want to know who I think about when I'm singing?”
“Yes.”
“And it's not going to make you jealous?” I flashed him a grin.
“Should it?”
I shook my head. “Not really, no.” As I spoke on, I felt my playful mood evaporate. “It's notoneperson I think of,” I told him. “It differs by song. Sometimes I think of my family. Sometimes I think of my ex.”
“Your ex?”
“My ex-husband,” I elaborated.
Shane's eyes went wide. He obviously hadn't anticipated that response. “You've been married?”
“Yes. Why does that surprise you so much? You know where I'm from.” In Goldstone, Indiana, inanyVinist territory really, it wasn't uncommon for omegas to marry young. Hell, it was uncommon for omegasnotto marry young.
“I figured you'd left before...”
“No. I left when I was eighteen.” I moistened my lips and dropped my gaze to the floor. Then I made myself raise my eyes again. This was not something I needed to be ashamed of. “I was married when I was sixteen.”
“You were married?” My choice of words didn't escape Shane. “You didn't want to marry, did you?”
I gave him a smile for being correct. “I wasn't asked.” My opinion had never mattered. From the moment my aunt and uncle discovered that I was omega, I'd never been asked for my thoughts on anything.
“I'm sorry,” Shane said. “That must have been awful.” He fell quiet again, but like before, I could tell there was something else he wanted to say.
I scooted closer to him. “Whatever it is, you can say it.”
He looked conflicted. “It's only... you sing about love, and what you're describing doesn't sound much like it.”
“I can't blame you for thinking that.” I ran a hand through my hair, struggling to find the words to describe my relationship with my ex to him. “It's true I didn't want to marry Harvey, but he wasn't a bad person.” At least not at first.
Shane scoffed. “How old was he when you two got married?”
“Thirty-two.”
“He was twice your age!”
There was nothing I could say to that. Shane wasn't wrong. “I know it sounds horrible from the outside,” I conceded. “I know itishorrible. But you have to take into account the way these people think. The way I used to think too. Our age difference wasn't anything weird where I lived.A young and foolish omega can use an experienced alpha to guide him, they said. Our families thought we were a good match, and that sealed the deal.” I shrugged. “I didn't want to marry, but I wasn't super opposed to it, either. I knew it was going to happen from the moment it became clear that I was an omega. I'd been made to believe that was simply the way the world worked.
“I got used to Harvey. I started to like him. Eventually, I started to love him.” I studied Shane's expression, trying to gauge his reaction to what I was telling him.
“You loved him?”
“In a way.” It was easier than resenting him.
“Can I ask what made you leave?”
I sank back into the couch. This was such a difficult topic. Not only because it was hard to explain, but also because it was emotionally draining. I didn't want to spend the whole night thinking of my ex and the reasons I'd broken out of that life.
“I'm sorry,” Shane said. “I shouldn't have asked. I only wanted to understand your songs. They... touch me.” He gave me a weak smile, as if this embarrassed him somehow.
“That's all I want.”
