Page 3 of A Baby for Christmas
"Why can'tyoube ‘someonebetter’?"
I swallowed. "We've had our run, remember?" I certainly did. We'd been young and desperate for attention, both of us starving for affection. Not the best basis for a relationship, even if we cared about each other. It hadn't taken us long to figure out that we didn't want the same things in life. Deep down, Robin was a hopeless romantic, and I was the least romantic person on the planet. I never wanted children, and Robin wantedallofthem.
Robin looked aside, maybe remembering the same ugly fight I did. We'd said some horrible things to each other and not spoken for nearly a year after. I'd nearly lost him and I wasn't going to risk that happening again. I couldn't go through another break-up with him either. It hurt toomuch.
Not that seeing him cycle through all these assholesdidn'thurt on somelevel.
"What if I don't care about babies anymore?" Robintried.
"You know that's not true." I kissed his hair before I could stop myself. Was he really willing to give up his dream for another shot with me? No, he was just heartbroken. "You shouldn't say things like that. It's notfair."
Robin shook his head and his hair tickled my nose. He smelled different tonight. No, notdifferent, just more intense, or was that my imagination? Inhaling, I drew his scent into my nose and nearly shuddered. He always smelled so sweet. Like candy cane and fudge and cupcakes. No other omega could even come close to the temptation he presented. Usually, when I saw him these days, he smelled like whatever alpha he was dating at the time, which helped me keep my hormones in check. Had he scrubbed himself before coming here tonight? "I'm not being unfair," he said. "Just realistic. I'm tired of waiting for a fairytale prince who doesn't exist when there'syou.You might not give me babies,but..."
"But what? You'd settle for me anyway?" The words came out more bitter than I meant them to. I hated that I couldn't be everything he needed, but even just the thought of becoming a parent made my blood run cold. I couldn't do it. Not now, not ever. I wasn't going to change my mind onthis.
"I'm not... that's not what I meant. I'm sorry. That was horrible. I meant that I might want you more than I wantbabies."
"You might, huh?" I shook my head. He'd been talking about the family he wasone day going to havefor almost as long as I'd known him. I couldn't be the guy who made him give that up. "You're only saying that because you just got dumped, and because it'sChristmas."
Robin sighed. "I've lost you too, haven'tI?"
"Nonsense. You haven't lost me. I only think we're better off asfriends."
"Maybe you're right. Can I just... " He inched closer to me. I didn't stop him. "Can I getonekiss? Just one? ForChristmas?"
God, did I ever want to give him that kiss. I shouldn't, though. I shouldn't even think about it. Giving Robin a single kiss was as impossible as eating a single potato chip. "That’s hardly a traditional Christmaspresent."
"No, it might not be traditional, but—" He stopped himself and his eyes wentwide.
"What’s wrong? You look like you swallowed afly."
"That's not... Shit." Robin inhaled, and the breath he exhaled was shaky. "I knew something was off, oh I am sostupid."
"What's goingon?"
Robin's eyes darted back and forth between me and the door, as if he couldn't decide whether he should stay or dash out. "No, I can't go out like this," he muttered to himself. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't plan this, you have to believeme."
"Didn't plan what?" I asked, and then it hit me. His scent. It had become way stronger than it usually was. He smelled like a whole chocolate factory. Like everything good in the world. I felt thrown back to my teenage days. This was what Robin had smelled like when his very first heat hit him. Hit usboth,really.
We’d been hanging around the park at night, since neither of us had anywhere else to be, and then we’d ended up making out behind one of the wooden play houses on the playground. I didn’t care that we were still in public, I couldn’t keep my hands off Robin—and he encouraged me every step of the way, even though I didn't know what I was doing and I was literally fumbling in the dark. A curse escaped me as the memory rose to the forefront of my mind. What was going on? Adults weren't supposed to go into heat like teenagers. And yet, when I inhaled, Robin's scent seemed to wrap itself around my brain and kill all rationalthought.
I feltdrugged.
Had Robin takendrugs?
"Robin... What did youdo?"
"It's a black-market product," he confirmed my suspicions, his eyebrows knitting together as if he had just as much trouble holding on to clear thought as I did. "It was... I know someone who... This was going to be my Christmas present to Calvin. You have to take it a couple hours in advance, and I... shit. I forgot." He rubbed his face with the heel of his hand. "I didn't... this wasn't.... how I planned it." His hand shook as he lowered it. "Damn, this stuff is hardcore." He tried a laugh, but it didn't sound super convincing. "Shit like this only happens to me, Iswear."
I grabbed his hand as if to steady him. "Will you beokay?"
"Sure." He gave me an awkward smile and I kind of wanted to kiss him—and not just because of the pheromones in the air, though they didn't help the situation. His gaze strayed to our hands. "Maybe, uh... don't touch me if you don't want me to jump you. I feel kind of jumpy if you know what Imean."
Oh yes, I did know what he meant. I was feeling it myself, but I couldn't make myself let go of his hand either. His skin was all warm and soft. "We really shouldn't," I said, even as I stroked my thumb across the back of his hand and he bit his lower lip in response, invariably drawing my eyes to hislips.
God, I loved thoselips.
"Just one kiss?" Robin asked. "To take the edge off? Then I'llleave."
