Page 85 of Omega's Flight
I didn't. "Damn." Not that long ago, I would have slapped myself for the swear word, but like in other things, omegas were on equal footing in swearing at Mercy Hills too.
"I'll take you up, then. Should probably see if there's anything legal that needs to be done too, but knowing Garrick, he left everything in perfect order."
I nodded and fell into step beside him. Stop wishing for things you aren't sure of. Except he acted like an alpha getting ready to court an omega.
And I was so confused I could cry.
C H A P T E R 6 0
B ax had the baby one morning early in May. He sent Fan over with a note, asking if I wanted to be there and excusing me ahead of time if I didn't feel up to watching someone else bring a child into the world after my own loss at Christmas.
I thought about not going, really thought about it. Isaac would have been born about this time, maybe would have already been cradled in my arms. I knew it was no one's fault, except perhaps mine, though Adelaide assured me it happened sometimes. More often when the bearer was malnourished, which she'd assured me I was.
So in the end I'd gone for the evening, then come back in the morning after I'd dropped my pups off at school and daycare. And it had been fine. I'd been fine, and surprised at how happy I was for Bax and his little boy. Not an omega, which Abel had claimed was a shame, as he’d been looking forward to adding to his collection. Bax had laughed and told him to stop hogging the baby and if he wanted more omegas he would have to work for them, which Abel had agreed to with a leer of alpha optimism that made me laugh.
I dropped over with food a couple of days after, on Bax's first day out of bed after having the baby. We were going to have lunch, and I was going to test myself and see how jumbled my own emotions got. Jason met me at the door. "Hi. Oh, is that lunch? Great! Saves me making it." He stepped back and held the door for me. "Come on in. He's having a shower right now."
The house was quiet. "I don't think I've ever been here when there haven't been a million pups running around."
Jason grinned and followed me into the kitchen. "Bax does love a big family. He'll have to stop at some point, though. There's only so many pups you can afford, even with Abel's income outside the enclave."
I set my shopping bag on the table and began to unpack it. "This can go into the oven to warm up." I'd tried my hand at scalloped potatoes, and made a small ham to go with it. Peas, carrots, biscuits. A berry crumble kind of thrown together at the last minute—it was the only thing that hadn't been cooked yet, but it could go in the oven while everyone ate. "I'm not sure Bax would let that stop him."
"Maybe not." Jason bustled around the kitchen, setting up the coffee maker, putting on water for tea and turning the oven on to heat. "You went to a lot of effort for this."
"I wanted to try the recipe. Don't worry, I left enough home for us too."
The squeak of a tap being closed echoed against the walls. We threw the meal into the oven and hustled to get the dishes out of the cupboard. "Is Abel coming for lunch?" I asked as I started laying place settings.
"He was going to, but Bax told him to not to. I think he wanted a day to get used to being up and around with the baby without Abel hovering and trying to do everything for him." Jason set out glasses of water, then disappeared down the hall, only to come back a moment later with Taden in his arms. "Here's the big boy!" he laughed and plopped the toddler into the high chair. "Yummy food coming soon, pup."
Soft footsteps padded up the hall and then Bax was there, rosy cheeked and wet-haired, with the baby caught up in a sling like the one I remembered him wearing back in Jackson-Jellystone. "Raleigh!" he cried softly and came over for a one-armed hug. "Thank you for coming over."
"I thought you'd like some food you didn't have to cook," I told him. "Sit down, you can play host some other time." Then, because I wanted to know that I could and because I thought it would ease Bax's mind, I peeked inside the sling to look at the baby. "Has he already grown some?"
"Just not as squished-looking now, I think," Bax said in a considered tone. "But he does eat well."
"That's the important part," I told him. Platitudes, but we all said them. "Sit down. We're warming everything up right now."
"You didn't have to do that—" Bax began, but I cut him off.
"I wanted to. And you'd have done the same for me if the situation had been reversed." And then, as brave as I'd ever been in my life, I held out my arms. "I don't suppose I can get a few minutes of baby time?"
He looked startled and stared intently at me for a moment, as if gauging how likely I was to break down with his newborn in my arms. I waited—I could be patient, for this. After a moment, he nodded and started to extract his new son from the sling. I got up from my chair and knelt beside him with my arms out.
I'd forgotten how light they were at this age. The little boy twitched and mewed, then fell back to sleep, mouth agape and one little fist curled up by his cheek. He smelled of soap and wolf, but mostly of that sweet smell that all babies seemed to give off. “What name did you choose?”
“Ryker. Abel and Fan are convinced he’s an alpha.” Bax appeared amused.
There was a sob wandering around inside my chest looking for escape, but I found I didn't need to let it out. Yes, this should have been mine. Yes, it wasn't meant to be. There would always be that question at the back of my mind and heart, of how my life would have been if he'd survived.
But I couldn't find it in me to be angry or jealous of Bax. So I sang songs to the little bundle and thought of Isaac and cooed at the baby.
"You know," Bax said softly. "There can be others. I'm proof of that."
I looked up at him and smiled. "I hope so." But I thought I'd make another walk over to the little pond tonight with the pups and spend some time there.
C H A P T E R 6 1
