Page 21 of Mating of Convenience
“I guess,” I said slowly, looking the dogs over once more. They sure were adorable, and Nathan was adorable too, giving them their treats. I couldn’t help but think back to our college years, though, and the way Nathan had talked about wanting to be a vet. Except he’d never quite gotten over his fear of needles. I’d tried helping him by giving him his first tattoo, but I’d been too inexperienced, moving too quickly and going to deep with the needle and he’d bailed halfway through our session. He never spoke of his medical ambitions again after that.
I knew his phobia wasn’t my fault, but I still felt responsible.
Nathan gazed away from me and the animals to look at the empty store. “The place would make a kick-ass tattoo studio,” he said as if he knew what I’d been thinking before he came.
“What would you like it to be?” I asked back to distract from myself. “I caught you staring at it the other day.” If Nathan still held any ambitions other than walking dogs, I wanted to know about that.
“Nothing,” Nathan lied. I only looked at him and he fessed up after a moment. “Okay, I thought I could fit a pet store in there.”
“A pet store?”
“Yeah, for geckos and newts and salamanders and stuff,” Nathan said like it was no big deal.
“That’s such a cool idea!” A grin spread over my face, glad that my friend’s spark hadn’t been totally extinguished after all.
“It’s never going to happen,” Nathan said, deflating even as one of the dogs, a poodle, started to walk circles around his legs, wrapping the leash around him as if she was the one in charge and Nathan her loyal subject.
“Why not?” I asked, watching Nathan try to untangle himself--and almost land flat on his face in the attempt. I shook my head at him. Seriously. I spent most of my day assisting omegas in need, but the alpha before me looked like he could use a little help as well.
“Same reason you don’t have your own tattoo studio,” Nathan replied as he picked the poodle up before she could cause more mischief. “I can’t cough up the money to start a business like that and the banks don’t think Oceanport needs an exotic pet shop.”
“The banks are stupid. Fuck the banks. Oceanport totally needs an exotic pet store.” What else interesting was there in this place?
“Yeah, you should go and tell them that.” Nathan gave me a soft smile and that moment, I swear I nearlyheardthe sound of something in my brain snapping.
That didn’t stop me from opening my mouth to speak, though. “Marry me,” I said.
“What?” Nathan stared at me, the smile vanishing from his face. I couldn’t blame him. I was shocked myself. What the hell was wrong with me?
“You said I should marry someone to get the money. Why not you?” I tried to justify the words that had slipped my mouth. “It sounds like you could use some money too.” I wanted to help him out, that was all. I didn’t care about buying the store anymore. Nathan should have it. He deserved to have it.
“I can’t marry you, Raph. Not like this.”
“Not like this?” What did he mean by that?
“Not at all!” he hurried to correct himself. “You know why not.”
“You said you were over our break-up.” I couldn’t help but dig in. It was a character flaw. I never knew when to stop.
“Iamover it. But that doesn’t change the fact that you hurt me. I’m not going to pretend-marry you for a bit of cash. That’s insane.”
“You’re calling it insane, but it was your idea in the first place.”
“I told you to marrysomeone, not me.”
“Fine,” I huffed. “I’ll marry someone else, if that’s what you want.”
“That’s not--“ Nathan started, then stopped himself. “You know what? Do whatever you want. You always do, anyway.”
Ouch. The worst thing was, I couldn’t argue with that.
It occurred to me that for as long as we’d been together, and even before, Nathan had always gone along with my selfish whims, and how had I thanked him? I’d left him, and now that I realized how much I missed him, I expected that I could just waltz right back into his life. He was right to be mad at me.
“I’m sorry.”
For a long moment, Nathan said nothing, checking on the dogs instead of looking at me. “It’s fine,” he muttered eventually. Then he gave a short tug on the leashes and walked away.
As I watched him go, I didn’t get the feeling that things werefineat all.
