Page 59 of Small-Town Secrets
Tyler, visibly angry now, was not going to let that stand. He balled his fists, about to attack his brother. Jesus Christ, I had to step in, didn't I? But I remembered the last time I'd tried to end a fight between Tyler and another child. I couldn't let things gothatway again.
While I was still thinking about what to do, though, Tyler pushed Chris into the snow covered grass around us. Or at least, he tried to. Chris held on to him at the last moment and pulled his brother down with him, and then he grabbed a fistful of snow and rubbed it into Tyler's face.
Tyler shrieked in response and jumped up again.
I almost laughed, but suppressed the sound. If I laughed they might think I approved of their actions, but I had to be a parent now, didn't I? Even if neither of them knew that I was their parent. And even if I had no clue at all how to be a parent. How was I supposed to know what to do with two seven-year-olds?
"Tyler," I said in my sharpest tone of voice when I saw the kid was ready to launch himself at his twin again. "Stop it."
He actually glanced my way, seemingly a little unsure if he should be listening to me or not. I was doing my damnedest not to send any alpha pheromones his way too. My goal wasn't to rule by fear.
Behind Tyler, Chris got up from the ground and formed a snowball in his hands. "Drop it," I told him. Chris looked surprised, but did as I told him. Tyler took his cues from his brother and unclenched his fists as well.
So far so good.
"I don't think either of you is mature enough to take the leash right now," I judged. "You can try again tomorrow."
I was met with identical pouts from the twins, but I wasn't going to change my mind now.
When I was being honest, I had no idea if I was doing the right thing. Consistency was key with dogs, but my sons weren't dogs, and this was probably not the outcome Laurence had hoped for when he told me to spend some one-on-two time with the children. I sure as hell wasn't endearing myself to them right now.
What if I never did?
* * *
When I got back home, the twins went for the TV and I let them. I made my way to the kitchen where Laurence waited for me at the table with a much-needed cup of coffee.
"How did you enjoy your walk?" Laurence asked, but I knew he was really asking how I enjoyed being alone with his kids. Our kids. I kept having to correct myself inside my head.
"They got into a fight," I admitted.
"Yeah?" Laurence sounded almost amused by this. "Don't worry too much about it. They do that all the time."
"I'm not worrying, I cleared it up, but still... It's tough to know how to act around them, you know? Now that I'm... Now that they're..."
"Your sons?" Laurence supplied helpfully.
"Yeah. I don't think they like me very much."
"Why do you think that?" Laurence held his own coffee mug in two hands and glanced at me over the rim of it. "You can't really do a worse job than Howard, if it's any consolation. He could never even tell them apart."
"I guess my goals are a little bit higher than 'don't be like Howard'." I shook my head. Howard hadn't evenhadto do a great job, that was the worst part. To the twins, he was their dad. I was a random stranger who'd given them karate lessons a few times and now somehow shared a bed with their daddy. "I don't know how to be a good dad," I admitted.
"You'll do fine. You don't have to become super-dad in a day. It means a lot to me that you care enough to try." Laurence glanced in the direction of the living room. Every now and then, we could hear the twins laugh at the TV. "You care about them, don't you?"
"I do." So much so that it scared me a little. "I want to be a part of their lives. I've already missed out on too much."
Laurence set his mug down and reached over the table to cover my hand with his own. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. I know things haven't been easy for you either."
"No, but it was a mistake to keep them from you even after I knew."
I swallowed, because, yeah, a part of me agreed, but I also understood what had kept Laurence from placing his trust in me, or any other alpha, for that matter. "You did what you thought you had to do to protect your children. I can relate to that."
"Can you?"
I nodded, intertwining my fingers with Laurence's and squeezing. I would have given anything to keep our boys from harm. "From now on, you won't have to protect them by yourself, I promise you that."
