Page 76 of Hard Rock Tease
"It's not as simple as that."
"No?" he asked. "Then what was it?"
I didn't know what to tell him. I knew he didn't like it when I went all fangirl on him, but I wanted him to understand. My feelings for him weren't just superficial.
I took a deep breath and looked in straight in the eye. "Your music saved me. With my mom…" My breath hitched as another stab of pain spiked through me. My eyes stung, the beginnings of tears threatening to fall. I blinked them back and cleared my throat. "I went through some really hard times," I continued. "Your music, your lyrics, they spoke to me. I know you don't like to hear this, but I felt like you understood me. Knowing that someone else understood what I was going through made it better somehow. It made all the bad things a little less terrible."
"I remember you saying you went through some tough times." He looked chagrinned. "I'm sorry I said all those shitty things to you. About your mom and everything else."
"I know you're sorry. I forgive you. Just don't do it again."
Noah shifted in his seat, looking uncomfortable. "I'm going to get us some drinks."
He grabbed two beers from the bartender and brought them back to our table. I hesitated before taking the beer he handed me.
"Maybe we should lay off the alcohol tonight," I suggested carefully.
Noah squinted at me. "Why?"
"It just seemed like we do a lot of drinking."
"I'm a rock star. It's what we do."
"I suppose." I picked at the label on the beer bottle. "I just wonder if it's too much sometimes."
Noah gave me a curious look. "Are you really so worried about it?"
"A little," I admitted. "The first time we really opened up to each other you said you didn't want to do it sober. And we're always going to a bar whenever we go out. You got drunk at that club and you got drunk at Cameron's party."
Noah eyed me. "I'm not an alcoholic."
"I'm not saying you are. I'm just saying maybe you don't always need alcohol to mask your feelings."
He leaned back in his chair, taken aback. "Is that what you think I'm doing?"
"I don't know. Maybe. We just finished talking about some heavy stuff and you immediately went to get a drink."
He went silent for a few moments before pushing his beer across to the other side of the table. "Okay. I won't drink tonight."
I met his eyes, surprised. "Really?"
"I'm not saying you're right. But if it bothers you so much I'll ease up."
Relief blossomed in my chest. "Thank you. That means a lot to me."
"Does this mean you want to continue spending the night talking about our feelings?" He almost grimaced as he said the words.
"I actually wanted to ask you something about the other guys."
Noah scowled. "If Cameron's being a pain in your ass—"
"No," I interrupted. "It's nothing like that." I flushed, not wanting to bring up the subject, but knowing it had to be said. "They know we're sleeping together."
"And?"
"And you're okay with that?"
"Why wouldn't I be?"
