Page 46 of Hot and Bothered
“I’m good, thanks,” he said. “I was just finishing up. You want to watch some more of that cartoon after I’m done getting out of the shower?”
No, I want to drag you off into your bedroom and get the both of us naked and—
“Sure,” I croaked. “Cartoon. Sounds good.”
Evan looked at me with a shrewd eye. “You okay?”
I nodded emphatically. “I’m great. I’m good. I’ll go turn on the TV.”
I fled to the living room, cursing myself the whole way.
I had chickened out. Completely chickened out. I hadn’t been able to force the words out of my mouth.
I want you, Evan.
I’m ready.
I brought my fist to my forehead and groaned quietly, cursing myself.
I had gone so many years without ever voicing my own wants and needs. I’d given in to every request my parents made of me. Did I even know how to speak up for myself anymore? Had I ever had that ability, or had it been squashed out of me early on?
Was this how it was going to be? Was this how I was going to live my life?
A kernel of anger began to rise in my chest at the thought.
No. I refused to let that happen. I may have been out of practice, or maybe I’d never learned how in the first place, but I was sure of one thing now.
For once, I was going to get what I wanted, even if I couldn’t yet speak the words out loud.
Evan was still in the shower when I went back to the spare room. I took the negligee out of the paper bag and held it in my hands, enjoying the contrasting sensation of smooth, cool silk and slightly scratchy, delicate lace.
I could do this.
“You want to make some popcorn?” Evan called out from the bathroom once the water had been turned off.
I didn’t answer him. I couldn’t answer him. My heart was in my throat as I waited in his bedroom in the dark.
He finally left the bathroom and continued calling out to the living room.
“I know you’re probably still full from the burrito.” He swung open the bedroom door, dressed again in jeans and a t-shirt. The light from the hallway made a halo around his body, making him appear like a glowing angel. He flipped on the light switch.
“What do you think—”
He stopped. He stared.
I sat on the edge of the bed in the skimpy red negligee that hugged my every curve, a flush on my cheeks. I met his eyes head-on, resisting the urge to duck my head down.
“You… Uh…” He didn’t seem capable of speaking in proper sentences. His eyes opened wide and roved all over my body as he took in his fill.
“Lizzy let me take it home with me,” I explained shyly.
He made that familiar strangled sound in the back of his throat.
“You look gorgeous,” he finally managed to say.
I stood and went over to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my body against his. I could already feel the hardening length in his jeans. Instead of feeling nervous or uncertain, I instead felt an odd sense of pride and had to suppress a gleeful smile. I loved how Evan reacted to me, just in the same way as I reacted to him.
“I’m not very good at asking for what I want,” I told him. “So I thought I’d show you.”
