Page 50 of Hot and Bothered
“What, for real?” Evan asked, sounding surprised. “No boys allowed?”
“I actually liked it, in a way,” I said. “The smartest person in school was a girl. The best athlete was a girl. The entire Student Council was girls. It was kind of great, seeing women in all these important roles.”
“I guess I can see how that would be empowering,” he said.
“It didn’t really help me any, though,” I said, lowering my eyes. “I still ended up being under my parent’s thumb. Talk about the opposite of empowering.”
“It might have taken you some time, but you’ve broken free,” Evan said. “You’re your own person now.”
My mouth dipped down into a frown.
“I only had to cut my entire family out of my life for that to happen,” I said.
“Maybe they’ll come around,” Evan said.
“Maybe,” I said doubtfully.
Evan didn’t know them the way I did. He had everyone reason to be optimistic. I had every reason not to be.
“Why don’t we get cleaned up and have breakfast?” I said. “I think I’ve finally figured out the toaster.”
“You mean how the bread goes in and toast comes out?” Evan’s eyes glimmered with mirth.
I pretended to glare and swatted him in the chest.
“I’ll have you know I’ve made toast at least twice without burning it,” I said.
“An outstanding accomplishment,” he said solemnly. “An amazing feat, indeed.”
“Keep that up and I’ll feed you burned toast on purpose,” I said.
“I wouldn’t want to waste perfectly good bread.”
He hopped out of bed, letting the sheets slip down to reveal his naked body. Daylight made him seem even more perfect, the sunlight making his tanned skin glow. I almost pouted in disappointment when he closed the bathroom door behind him. I could have ogled him for a couple more minutes at least.
That was okay, though. I had all the time in the world to ogle Evan. And touch Evan. And kiss Evan. And do a dozen other things that were far more intimate than kissing.
I shivered as my aching core throbbed a quick beat, remembering how it had felt to have him inside me.
Evan had been my first. That was such an important milestone. But I didn’t feel any different this morning. Not really. I didn’t have any sudden epiphanies or bombshell revelations about myself. All I felt was a cloud of warm contentment filling every crack and chasm inside me.
I felt like a brand new person now. I felt… whole.
It wasn’t like I thought Evan was filling an emptiness inside me or anything. He had buried himself deep into my heart, that was true, but I wasn’t relying on another person to make me feel complete.
No, it was more like I’d finally discovered a missing piece to complete the intricate puzzle of my life. And I’d done the work to find that piece myself.
Maybe it was because I’d taken the initiative and gone for what I wanted. Maybe it was because I’d finally found a way to live my life for myself and not for anyone else.
I grabbed Evan’s discarded t-shirt from the floor and slipped it on. It covered about as much of my legs as the negligee had, which was not very much, but it would do. I liked being surrounded by Evan’s scent. Besides, didn’t guys think this sort of thing was cute? According to rom-coms, anyway.
I waited until I heard Evan turn off the water to put the bread into the toaster, wanting to get the timing right. I didn’t take my eyes off it the entire time. I panicked and hit the stop button twice, worried the bread was becoming too dark, but both times the surface was still pale and I had to put the bread back in for another round.
The toast finally popped out. It was the perfect shade. I was quite pleased with myself until I went to get the butter out of the fridge and realized the tub was empty.
I stared into the container. Had I really put the empty butter back in the fridge the last time I’d made toast?
Before, I might have groaned and chastised myself. Now, I only chuckled. I had put an empty tub back in the fridge. It was a silly mistake, no doubt from a moment of absent-mindedness. Maybe I’d been thinking of Evan naked in the shower the last time and been distracted. That would make a lot of sense.
