Page 101 of Roses, Pearls, and Hot Summer Nights
Us.There is anus.I am part of an us. “I know we’re young, and it might be way too early to think about, but I would stay with you. In case anyone was curious, I would, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m going to be sent away. Tonight should have proved my family’s plans to you.”
Jeremy took my hand. “We’ll figure it out. Bath. Come on.”
I let him run the water for me before he left me in the bathroom. He leaned against the side of the tub, running his fingers in the water as he said, “My mother was seventeen when she knew she loved them. Younger, if we’re being honest, but she grew up in the life. Granny was young, too, and she didn’t grow up around it. Maybe it’s something you can adjust to better younger. I don’t know. I just know what I feel.”
“The life?” My ears rang.
“Right, that’s what they call it.The Life. It’s a thing.”
I laughed, tugging at my earlobe as if to relieve the pressure. “A lot of things make more sense now. I thought … never mind. No more secrets. Ask Phoenix to explain things, would you? I can’t do any more confessionals tonight.”
Jeremy said, “How about one more? I’m in love with you. I’m probably telling you too soon, but there it is. Get a good soak, come out, then rest. It’ll be quiet again eventually.” He winced. “We’ll have two weeks of peace before the small party. At least that one is actually friends from Louisiana in town, although they usually consider it an opportunity to introduce us to women.” He shook his head. “Obviously, not this year, and I’ll make sure of it.”
I kissed him. “That sounds like … hell.”
“Yes.” He grinned. “It does. See you in a bit.”
I stripped and sank into the inviting hot water. Closing my eyes felt nice, but my brain didn’t turn off.Why did they do this to me?Why is it so important to tell everyone how I’m justnothing? Why do they want to send me away so badly? Wouldn’t it be cheaper if I just stayed out of the way until I was old enough to leave legally? Why did they hire a PI to follow me? Why not leave me alone? What happened to my mother’s share of the family’s fortune? Did my mother overdose? Why did I never ask any of it before?
The water went cold before I could think of answers to any of the questions pinballing around in my mind. I shivered and forced myself to get out of the water. I loved taking baths. I never got a chance to indulge in one since San Francisco. Chicago and Manhattan only offered showers. I wondered if I could use the tub again sometime, when I wasn’t suffering from emotional battering.
I put on a long t-shirt that hung to my knees, braided my damp hair, then brushed my teeth. Phoenix and Barrett sat with their heads close together, watching something at low volume on Barrett’s phone.
Barrett glanced toward me then pointed at his phone. “We’re rewatching your stream, now that we know you’re the creator. We’re trying to see if we can pick out the points that show the actual you. Gretchen isn’t you, not in the way either of you speak or anything, but the way you both watch everything? Yeah, that issoyou.” He patted the bed next to him. “Come, lie down.”
“I will if you’ll turn it off. I actually don’t like to watch episodes after I release them. It gives me painful goosebumps.”
I climbed between them, and he turned off the phone. “Should we watch something else?”
“How about something funny?” I suggested. I could use a laugh.
He opened another app and put on a silly sitcom—perfect. Mindless, but occasionally it would catch my attention, and I could laugh a little. The twins returned and scrunched into the bed to watch with us. We tumbled together in sort of a snuggled-up pile. We wouldn’t be able to sleep that way, but for a half hour or so, it felt great.
Eventually, Julian climbed out of the bed. “I love sleeping in here. Particularly next to you, but even on the floor. It just feels … correct. Like I’m where I’m supposed to be.” He locked the door and then the screen door. I loved that he noticed my need for locks before sleep. I almost groaned when I realized tonight might have taught them all to understand why a bit more.
Julian added, “You’re not a charity case Alatheia. Not even a little bit. You’re with us now. I just wish you believed it.”
Phoenix rolled on his side as Jer got off the bed.It’s Barrett’s night, I remembered. They all started pulling off their clothes until they only wore boxers, their clothing discarded around the room at random. They took turns in the bathroom before the lights eventually went out as they settled into their places around the room.
Despite my being sandwiched between two guys, the thump of the band reached my ears from outside. “What would you be doing tonight if you weren’t in here with me?”
Phoenix kissed my shoulder. “There’s always a party somewhere. Who knows where I’d be.”
“Yep,” Julian agreed. “We would look for another one when our party ended. I’m pretty content being here tonight instead.”
“Same,” Jeremy replied. “The band was bad, anyway. Or maybe I just hate them because only Barrett got to dance with you.”
That didn’t make sense, so I asked him, “What?”
“Well, Stephen thought we were making a scene. He reminded us they stay away from Mom in public, and we needed to do the same. They also reminded us that it sucked, but we knew the nature of the situation. Only one of us with you in public. Barrett grabbed you, so the rest of us had to back off.”
Phoenix sighed. “Yeah, I wasn’t letting that stop me. I was going to dance with her.”
I laughed and then they all did. Julian rolled onto his stomach. “Me too. You eventually would have, too, Jer.”
“Can I ask a possibly inappropriate question?”
Barrett stroked a finger down my nose. I wondered if his hand still hurt, so I gently touched the back of it with my own fingertips. “Anything,” he said.
