Page 23 of Dahlias, Sapphires, and Cool Autumn Dusk
I changed my clothes and arrived to find Barrett had obviously already heard about the whole day from his brothers. His whole demeanor had changed, especially the way he heldhimself, stiff and rigid and ready for a fight. It was his first day of college, so I really didn’t want to add to his levels of stress.
“I’m okay,” I said as I walked over to him. “Actually, all in all, it wasn’t a bad day. I don’t want you to worry about me.”
He shook his head, smoothing my hair away from my forehead. “Don’t you worry about me, she says. Aren’t you worrying about me worrying right now?”
I grinned, because he called it. “Sure.”
“Then you’re going to find a way to deal with me worrying about you, too. What Maggie did wasn’t okay. Collins, either. Although I don’t know why we didn’t know she was giving Phoenix shit before now.”
Jeremy motioned for me to sit, so I squished in between Barrett and Jeremy. Julian sprawled across from us, as shirtless as his brother and wearing shorts. They both held a beer.
After we all ate—including an eggroll each, because that was essential according to Julian—Jeremy spoke again. “Maybe he didn’t tell you because you’re not his father. Despite you taking care of all of us—and I know you have—it’s not your job. I can’t speak for Phoenix, but I know I don’t want my life overflowing onto yours. Maybe he’s just handling shit himself.”
Julian laughed. “Badly.”
I stretched in my pajama pants and a tank top—my preference, if I could wear anything at any time, the most comfy outfit possible. Despite my arguments to the contrary, apparently I couldn’t just live in pjs full time. I glanced at Jeremy and realized I would probably feel the same as him, in that position. I wouldn’t want someone else responsible for my choices either.
Barrett blinked rapidly, as if surprised. “I didn’t try to raise you. At least I never thought I did. I only wanted to make sure everyone was solid.” He squirmed in his seat. “Alatheia and I are going to a jazz club Friday. Anyone else want to come?”
Jeremy groaned, but Julian nodded. “I’m in.”
“Great,” he said then smiled. “Celeste Demille is in town, playing at Lincoln Center, but I have it on good authority she is going to Miller’s the night before. Obviously, I’m going.”
I swallowed, recognizing the name. “She’s been playing jazz since the sixties mostly in New Orleans, right?”
His answering smile was huge. “That’s right. You are so awesome.”
Julian tapped on the table to get my attention. “Are you busy now?”
I knew what he wanted, since I had promised to read the play. “I’m done eating, and I have time.”
Jeremy glanced between us. “What am I missing?’
Julian shoved his shoulder. “I finished my play, and I asked Alatheia to read it.”
“Oh. ” He seemed genuinely curious as he scanned his brother. “That’s awesome. Can I read it?”
“Yes, but after her.” He nodded toward Barrett. “You can, too, if you want later.”
Their oldest brother sat back in his seat, uncrossing his legs and stretching before he stood. “Sure, I’d love that. I actually have to do some reading for school, too, so I’ll be in my room unless anyone needs me.”
Jeremy yawned. “I am going to watch television.”
I translated that to mean he would fall asleep on the couch, though I couldn’t blame him. My muscles were already starting to ache, and I didn’t do half of what they did in the pool. Despite that, I managed to follow Julian to his room, where he pointed at the desktop. “Can you read it there or do you want me to print it out for you?”
“Computer is fine. I am actually more comfortable with it than I would be holding a bunch of printer paper.”
He clicked to open the file, glancing back at me with his devastatingly handsome grin. “Me too. It’s different than holding a book, but all that doesn’t matter right now. Anyway, my play is tentatively titledGhostlighting.”
I swallowed, not sure if I could handle it if he went full gore. “Is it a horror thing?”
“No, it’s about the ghosts we carry with us—literally and figuratively. It may be really stupid, so I have to let you read it before I chicken out. Anyway a ghostlight is the light left illuminated on the stage when the theater is empty.” Uncertainty tinged his voice, but I understood his hesitation well enough since I felt the same way ever since I showed them I wrotePoor Relation.Something about having someone else reading and judging your work made the nerves sensitive, regardless of who you were.
But an ache formed in the pit of my stomach as I worried about what I would say if it sucked.Shit.I couldn’t lie to him, because he would know… Julian ran a hand through his brown hair, his blue eyes full of nerves and worry.
I squeezed his hand. “Is there anything you can do so you aren’t actively watching me read?”
He nodded, glancing at the doorway. “I can go watch television with Jeremy.”
