Page 100 of Fish out of Water
I nodded again, unable to give her more of an explanation.
The last woman who saw me for what I really was laughed when I wanted us to be more.
When I thought we already were.
“It’s nice that you have so many ways to remember him.” She suddenly looked very sad. “To feel close to him.” She sucked a breath through her nose, the sadness seeming to disappear almost instantly. “What about the computer?” She grinned at me over one shoulder as she went to my chair and sat down, wiggling back and forth a little. “This looks like the setup of a serious gamer to me.”
“I don’t know that I’d say serious.” I still didn’t want to admit it all. Still didn’t want her to see me as what I really was.
Julia lifted one brow at me. “You spent an awful lot of money on it for someone who’s not serious.”
I tried to shrug it off.
Pretend I didn’t really care that much about what I was showing her.
“Maybe you can teach me to play sometime.” Julia tucked her knees up to her chest, the fabric of her skirt billowing out around the chair where she sat.
Like a fucking queen perched on her throne.
A queen I would gladly let rule my world.
Her lips barely twisted into a smile. “Unless you want a worthy opponent.”
She was the most worthy opponent I’d ever faced. “I’m sure you would slaughter me.”
“I mean.” Julia lifted one shoulder. “If you say so.”
I set the bag down on the coffee table in the small sitting area of my project room. “What about you, Jules?” I eased down onto the sofa I picked out myself. It wasn’t like anything upstairs, but it was comfortable as hell. “What about your dad? Are you close to him?”
Her expression changed in an instant, the relaxed set of her jaw tightening as her eyes dropped to the floor between us. “No. I’m not.”
It made her understanding of what was down here even more amazing. “I’m sorry.”
She offered a smile that barely touched her lips. “Don’t be. It was my own choice.”
“How’s that?”
She reached out to adjust the fabric of her dress, shifting it around. “My parents have very strong beliefs that I don’t agree with.”
I wanted to ask more, but couldn’t bring myself to dig deeper into something that clearly caused her pain.
“So I left as soon as I turned eighteen.” She straightened. “Got my own apartment. Put myself through college. Found a job I really enjoyed.” Pride shined in her eyes. “I started living the way I believed I deserved to live.”
“But…” I knew it was coming.
Something that would piss me off to ungodly levels.
“I thought it would be okay.” She chewed her lip for a second. “They’re my parents, right? They are supposed to love me no matter what.” Julia swallowed. “But my father said if I didn’t start living the kind of life they wanted me to then they wouldn’t have anything to do with me anymore.” She sniffed a little. “So I left.”
“He cut you off?” It was impossible to keep the anger out of my voice. “Just because you wouldn’t do what he said?”
“That’s sort of how it works in their world. Women do what men say.” Her eyes lifted to mine. “Always.”
The full scope of her life widened, giving me a better view of the life that made Julia the woman she was now.
And it made it clear she was so much more than I realized. So much stronger. So much more determined.
So much braver.
