Page 45 of This Love
“It used to be more important than it is now. Your dad wasn’t in the picture back then. You were on your own after you ran away.”
“Give me a rundown of the worst of what she did.”
I sat back against the cushions. “When we first met, you told me she would remove pages from your journals so you couldn’t relearn anything she didn’t want you to know. And sometimes she would substitute pages with her own words and pretend they were yours.”
Ava pressed her hand to the tattoo. “Which is why I told myself to only trust this handwriting.”
“Right. When you lose your memory, it is like a fresh start for everyone around you. They can decide what you should know about them.”
“So, I started documenting everything I could so I would have a more complete picture.”
“Exactly.”
“What else did she do? You said she pretended I was fifteen when I was eighteen so I wouldn’t leave home.”
“There was that, for sure. But she also tried to get you declared medically incompetent in the children’s hospital so you couldn’t leave even at eighteen. That way, the police would bring you back if you ran away.”
“Wow. I guess that failed.”
“Yes. You were really smart in the hospital, and the social worker wouldn’t sign off on it.”
“When we met?”
“Yes, when we met.”
“And you helped me.”
I didn’t want to overstate my role. “I tried.”
She nodded. “Okay, is that it?”
“She got me arrested. She didn’t want us to see each other. I taught you about the world, and she didn’t want you to know anything, so you would have to rely on her. And she would move you whenever you made friends, hoping your memory would reset, and you would forget them.”
“That’s awful.” Ava clasped her hands tightly together in her lap. “No wonder I got the tattoo.”
“You tried to work with her after a reset when you were nineteen. Harry drove you out to her house because you wanted to move in with her. He didn’t know not to.”
She sits up tall. “Harry drove me there?”
“He didn’t know. He does now. He would never do it again.”
Ava stood up, pacing back and forth in front of the television. “Will she try to come for me? Was she invited to the wedding?”
I needed to bring her down. I could see her agitation rising. “She was not invited to the wedding. She got…pushy when you were twenty. She would show up at your apartment. She worries about you, maybe a little excessively.”
“I see.” Ava stopped walking. “But she’s not a danger? Not a threat?”
“I don’t think so. You might be vulnerable for a day or two after a memory reset, but once you have oriented yourself again, you know not to go anywhere with her.”
“Would she kidnap me?”
I hesitated. Geneva had tried to take off with Ava the time Harry drove her home. “I don’t think she’d push you into a white van and make off with you.”
“But you don’t know.” Ava’s hands tightened into fists as she walked back and forth. “I need that self-defense class!”
“We’ll get it done as soon as we can.” I wanted to stand up, hold her close, comfort her, but I knew better than to try.
“But I don’t know what she looks like!” She gestured to the window. “I might have just talked to her on the street!”
