Page 70 of Bad at Love
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
“Good night,” I whisper to him as I reach over and flick off the lamp, putting us in darkness.
“Good night,” he says.
Then he reaches over for me and pulls me back into him as he moves forward, so he’s spooning me from behind, pressed hard against my back.
My body ignites from the feel of him against me, the flames only tempered by the tenderness in my heart.
It would be so easy to tilt my head back, pull his face down to mine. To kiss him. To fall into that kiss from last night. To pick up where we left off.
But it would get messy, fast. It would get wild. And I would lose myself to him when I’m feeling most vulnerable. I feel like my whole soul is an open wound right now and that if I’m not careful, if I’m not smart, I could do some serious, irreversible damage.
So I just let him hold me and for tonight, it’s enough. It’s more than enough. I’m by no means a small and dainty person but he’s just so large next to me that it’s impossible not to feel safe and protected. His height, his muscles, the breadth of his strong shoulders as his thick arms wrap around me, he’s my rock and anchor and everything I need him to be right now.
“Sweet dreams, sweet girl,” he murmurs to me, kissing the back of my head.
My heart flutters.
And I melt.
CHAPTER TEN
LAZ
“ALL THAT’S MINE”
“So doyou think you can make it?” Abigail, my editor, says to me over the phone. “Again, I am so, so sorry that this is last minute. Things at the publishing house have been crazy lately, everyone is gearing up for the summer.”
“I can make it,” I tell her.
“Great, I’ll go ahead and book the flight and email you all the details.” She pauses. “Will you be going alone or should I try and get two seats. If I get two, then I’m afraid it can’t be a business class seat.”
“Uh,” I stammer. “I—I don’t know yet. I haven’t had a chance to process it…”
“I understand. How about you email me later today and let me know. Don’t want to wait too long, the LAX to New York flights are often sold out at such short notice.”
I tell her thank you and hang up, dazed.
My editor just called to tell me they’re having a book launch party in New York for the release ofEverything’s Ruined,and obviously, they want me to attend. It’s a month before the actual release of the book, which is why the whole thing has caught me by surprise but she says it’smainly for the review sites and there will be a lot of bloggers, press and industry people there, plus advanced review paperbacks to give out.
Now my dilemma is whether to go by myself or not.
It’s been ten days since that incident with Marina’s dad.
Ten days since I stayed the night at her house.
Ten days since she fell asleep in my arms.
Ten days since I realized I’m in so fucking deep with her, there’s no way out for me.
And despite the fact that I kept my hands to myself, that we didn’t even kiss, that I showed a fuck load of restraint to not completely devour her, things have changed between us.
It was apparent the next morning. The ease we have around one other was gone. Tension replaced it instead. I know Marina was smarting because of what happened with her father, I know she felt ashamed and embarrassed and I did what I could to let her know her feelings were unwarranted. What happened with her father was rough, there was no doubt about that. But it only made me want her more, to know that I was shown this dark part of her life. It made me feelspecial.
