Page 64 of The Shadow Prince's Ruin
“I will. I do. I accept it,” he says, as if he expects me to take back my offer if he doesn’t take it fast enough. He’sglowingwhen he stands on his toes and pulls me down by my elaborate cravat for a kiss. His lips are so soft, so welcoming, and he said yes to my proposal. I knew my suffering would eventually lead me somewhere good. Even in my darkest moments, I’ve never lost hope and it’s why I crawled out of that river in what I thought was a dream. I could have given in to despair and let the current take me, but deep in my gut, I knew there was more for me.
And here it is, in my arms, and it has the form of the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.
“Then let’s do it,” I urge him. “Let’s marry now!”
There are whole galaxies in his eyes, and each time I peek into them, the need to take a leap of faith becomes more insistent. I don't think I’ve ever wanted anything this much.
Sylvan slips out of my grasp, and I already miss his fresh smell, his warmth. Determination and focus are back on his face as helooks around. “Yes. All you truly need to do once I cover us with my shadow, is vow that you are mine, body, soul, and shadow. And mean it. But!” He raises his finger when I’m about to say these magic words, because fuck yes, I can say it and mean it. This tiny cutie owns me already, even if it’s him who’s mine in the sheets. “Bear with me a second, I want to do things right. Or as right as possible,” he adds, exasperated, when he plucks a big red rose out of a lush bouquet on a side table. “Tradition dictates the rose should be of the midnight blue variety, but this will do.”
I remember another thing he’s talked about extensively and dash for the window. As soon as I pull away the curtain, we are covered in the glow of a moon larger than any I’ve ever seen, and for a moment I forget why I’ve uncovered it in the first place.
I almost feel its cool radiance, as if it were the morning sun in the summer. “It’s so… so different.”
“It’s closer to us than the one in your world,” Sylvan says and approaches me with the rose. “I hope you will be able to enjoy it as much as the sun.”
“I’d rather have you than the sun.” I slide both my hands under his jaw. His neck is delicate, like a bird’s, and I promise myself that he will never be harmed as long as I’m around. No matter what I have to do in this strange new world, I will take care of him in ways his family never did.
He looks up at me, so full of emotion, and I’m reminded of how he grabbed a stool at the grimsmith’s to reach my lips for a kiss.
“Would you like to be higher?” I point to a large chest he could stand on, but he stops me when I try to move.
“No. I want you to see me as I am and choose me still,” Sylvan says with all seriousness, as if he had warts all over his face, not skin smooth as porcelain, sweet pink lips, and a compact body I imagine naked whenever my thoughts drift off.
I nod, eyes pinned to his earnest expression. “Of course I choose you. How could I choose anyone else now that I met you?”
I feel like the biggest sap when my eyes start stinging, but the words come straight from my heart. My brothers always mocked me for my interest in pretty twinks, but they don’t get it. I have a soft side I can only show to someone who isn’t like me. Sylvan’s personality might be all jagged edges on the outside, but they fit mine like we’re two pieces of the same broken vase. Life has dragged us both over the gravel in different ways, and to him, I can be important, special. Not just because of my shadow. I sense in his touch, in his kisses, and in his words, that he needs to be taken care of.
He can handle himself. Hell, he was the one to lead us here, to get his collar off, and to kill a man who stood in his way. But he’s so fragile in places he shows no one else but me. He seeks my hugs and attention like an abandoned kitten, and I’ll never betray him. He might be a prince of the Nocturne Court and some shadow wielding mage, but I can give him the safety and affection he craves. If this is all some elaborate scheme at manipulating me, then so be it.
I gasp when his pale shadow rises off the floor behind him like a silent ghost. “Don’t be afraid,” he whispers when I flinch, but when the shadow expands and settles over us like a widow’s veil, a strange sense of peace overcomes me.
“So now, I grab this rose by the stem,” Sylvan explains, and I’m about to stop him at the sight of sharp thorns, but it’s too late. He closes his palm and squeezes it with a hiss. “And now you put your hand over mine,” he says, holding the rose between us.
I spot a droplet of blood sliding down his hand and hope this ritual doesn’t involve any more pain on his side. I want to grab a piece of cloth and wrap his hand, but he is the one who knows what he’s doing, so I swallow my discomfort and cradle hisslender hand in mine, like he told me. I tower over him in every way, yet when our eyes meet, I know he’d be as ready to stand between me and danger as I am for him.
“And now?” I whisper, afraid the sound of my voice might shatter the spell that’s meant to connect us forever.
“This gesture symbolizes that even though I take your shadow, I will not abuse your trust. I will take the brunt of any injury.” Sylvan is so earnest as he looks into my eyes. His hand is so dainty in mine, but he’s the one bleeding, and I get it, suddenly choked up.
With my size, and the violence I so easily mete out, I never thought anyone would consider wanting to bemyprotector. I always thought that I would always be the one to give while my partner takes. Yet here Sylvan is, promising to bleed for me. I’m so touched I don’t know what to do with myself, but Sylvan saves me by speaking.
“You are truly my promised, a man brought to me by destiny. I never imagined I would one day have a Dark Companion of my own, let alone one who is also my lover. I know you’re leaving behind your world, and everything you know, so this is my promise that I’ll make sure you never regret choosing me. I would have not been able to save you from the River of Souls, and yet a twist of fate sent you my way. You give me courage, you make me believe in myself, you make me laugh, and you touched parts of me that no one ever has.”
Sylvan shoves me gently when I smirk. “I don’t meanthoseparts!” He takes a deep breath and goes on while my insides turn into mush. “I love you, and I will never abuse my position. I will trust you, I will cherish you, and if you ever find yourself in darkness, I will be your moonlight. And as I promised you when we met, my body is yours.”
It might be cliche, but I really do feel at a loss for words as he makes his declaration in a voice trembling with emotion. SoI swallow and lean closer as the warm glow of the moon’s rays caresses my face. Nobody has ever even tried saying such things to me. I’m almost afraid that I don’t deserve so much love, that Sylvan’s belief in me is misplaced. But as joy bubbles in the middle of my chest, I find the strength to chase away doubts and tell myself that whether I am worthy of trust or not is up to me, and the very idea of disappointing this sweet man, who’s pickedmeover others makes me ache.
I clear my throat, noticing that my silence is unnerving to him. “I… I don’t know such pretty words. I would write a poem for you, if I could, but since I don’t know how, I want you to know this: I willalwaysbe in your corner, okay? If you jump down a cliff, I will follow. You’re the one who makes plans, and I’ll help you fulfill your dreams, because being at your side already fulfills mine. I will do my best so that you’re always happy and so you never regret bonding to me.”
My lips dry as I squeeze his hands more firmly. I know I can never satisfy his poetic heart, but maybe I don’t have to? Maybe all he needs from me is what Icanoffer? “I love you.”
“Hawk…” Sylvan whispers, and a tear slides down his cheek.
I kiss it off his skin. I want to always be there to dry his tears. “Is this… Are we married now?” I ask, giddy like a kid offered a ball of cotton candy bigger than his head.
Sylvan snorts, looking just as happy as I feel. “You still need to saythe wordsand mean them.”
“Ah yes!” I got so overwhelmed with my vow that I completely forgot about it, but I still remember the sentence he told me earlier, so I repeat it to him, full of excitement for what this next chapter of my life will bring. “Sylvan Goldweed, the most handsome elf ever, I promise you that from now on I am yours, body, soul, and shadow.”
